Yes, I know. You’d rather go to the dentist. Okay, maybe it’s not quite so bad, but most parents are just not comfortable talking to their kids about sex. And the sad truth is that many of us don’t even admit that to ourselves. As a sex therapist, when I am speaking to groups of …Continue Reading
I’m Canceling Virginity
I hate the term “virgin.” And just so we’re all on the same page, the dictionary definition is “someone who has never had sexual intercourse.” As I’ve written before, there’s a lot more to sex than intercourse (like fingering, oral sex, etc.), and it seems ridiculous to me that we’re using this word to mean …Continue Reading
Boys and Girls…And Sex
“It’s 10pm. Do You Know Where Your Children Are?” This was a 20-year running public service message on TV airing before the local news. I took this line at face value – check that your kids are home at night. Looking deeper, we need to check on where our kids are physically, but also emotionally, …Continue Reading
Mom and Vibrator in the Same Sentence?
Times have changed. I mean, really, REALLY changed. When was the last time you saw a grown woman express her sexual frustration to her adult daughter on TV? Never? Well, enter one of (IMHO) the greatest series to ever hit the small screen – Jane the Virgin. Things were so steamy in S5 E6 (Chapter …Continue Reading
The Sex Talk
Many of us have heard the camp song, “If all the raindrops were lemon drops and gum drops, Oh what a world that would be….” This song depicts an idealized picture of reality. In a recent YouTube video called “What the Sex Talk Looks Like Now,” a father is attempting to have “The Talk” with …Continue Reading
What’s In a Name? Turns out… A lot!
I was once at a conference where the speaker asked the women in the room, of which there were hundreds, what they were taught to call their external genitalia as young girls. Hands shot up and women listed dozens of different names for this part of the female body: va-jay-jay, muffin, front bum, hoo hoo…the …Continue Reading
Are You Watching Sex Education or Are You Just Glad to See Me?
Heard about Netflix’s new series “Sex Education”? It’s garnering a lot of press and tons of eyeballs (as in 40 million-member households, according to the streaming network). Not surprising when you consider the show’s compelling elements: a current British high school setting that’s infused with 1980’s imagery; leading characters who are openly gay and others …Continue Reading
Judy Blume and Puberty
Judy Blume’s 1970 classic “Are You There God? It’s Me, Margaret” is being adapted into a movie. Woohoo! I am one of the women for whom this sweet, funny, authentic story about preteenhood was a lifesaver. This book is like a good friend who is there to normalize our experience and to ease the anxiety …Continue Reading
Yes Mike, there is a G –Spot.
Last week, while teaching a basic HIV prevention class to a group of 8th graders it came to question time and a hand immediately went up from the back of the class, stretched as high as possible. I expected one of the usual questions: “Is it better to use 2 condoms? Where does HIV come …Continue Reading
Putting Pleasure into Sex Education
My younger patients, twenty and under, are often confused and seem a little uncomfortable when I ask them about their “Desire” for sex. Their answers include: “fine,” or “ok.” I will then try and make them more comfortable and normalize the idea that sexual desire is a normal and healthy part of life. Many women …Continue Reading