To the Partners of Vaginismus Patients

Your partner just found out that she has vaginismus. She is either relieved, devastated, or a combination of the two, depending on how much time she has spent avoiding the issue, jumping between health care providers, and trying to understand the condition. Now you are trying to understand what vaginismus is, figure out what your …

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Use It Or Lose It

You may have heard the term “use it or lose it” about your vagina and thought it was tongue in cheek. It isn’t. Recently, I was talking to some people in our marketing department and I mentioned the “use it or lose it” principal and they started to laugh. “Well that’s just an expression, isn’t …

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Tensing Your Body During Sex

It seems that part of having an orgasm for many women is tightening up their pelvic muscles. This is yet another example of one of those things that women do which they think is “weird.” Most women whom I’ve spoken with give me one of their “oh-my-g-d-you’re-not-going-to-believe-me” looks when they admit that they need to …

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The Bible of Sex

Year after year, decade after decade, when someone asks me what my favorite book on sex is, I answer easily: The Guide To Getting It On by Paul Joannides. It’s the bible of sex, I tell people. It really has everything you will ever need to know about sex. As the years have gone by …

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On the Topic of Porn

Recently, a NY Times article ran that focused on our use of the word “porn” for so many other areas of our lives. “Food Porn,” “Real Estate Porn,” and even “Poverty Porn.” All of these have become a short-hand to describe a specific kind of relationship we have with pleasures or concerns in our life. The …

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