Vulnerability Hangover

Vulnerability catches us at all the wrong times, or does it?  I recently heard the term “vulnerability hangover” and completely related.  There have been so many times I have felt like I tried something new or said something out of the ordinary and felt great about it at the moment. I felt empowered and really …

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Sex and Podcasts

While reading is one of my favorite things to do, I have to admit that I can’t read quite as much as I would like. While I still can’t replace reading with audio books, I have taken to listening to podcasts. As a therapist who specializes in sexuality I have found a particular interest in …

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Kink Is Not Abuse

Strangling a partner, grabbing and pulling hair, and slapping someone all sound like forms of physical abuse, and indeed can be. In fact as someone who has worked with hundreds of survivors of intimate partner violence these activities are often what was described to me. Many of them finally left the abuser when their partner …

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Sex and Pizza

I am always searching for new ways of talking about sex, and sexual pleasure.  A Ted Talk by sex educator, Al Vernacchio discusses the ways we as an American society talk about sex.  He brought up the interesting notion that we often use Baseball as a way of talking about sex and sexual activity as …

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What Should Go in the Vagina?

We live in the world of internet health, for good and bad. I admit to turning to the internet for medical advice. A rash on my arm, a strange feeling in my chest, and I turn to Dr. Google. However, in the end, the overwhelming amount of advice and strange ideas usually sends me straight …

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The Right Condom Can Make All The Difference

I have been teaching sex education for years, and again and again I would get the same response as to why people don’t wear condoms: “It doesn’t feel the same.”  And indeed they were right.  Wearing condoms during intercourse is not the same as going without. The feelings and sensations are different, however with the …

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Orgasm Gap…Kind of Like the Wage Gap

Wouldn’t it be nice if legislation could be introduced to address the orgasm gap?  The ground breaking supreme court decision known as “The Equal Pay Act of 1963” requires that men and women be given equal pay for equal work.  How did this legislation come about?  Women asking for it, women and men fighting for it …

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All About Lube

I am not sure where this myth came from, but it is one that we need to constantly address in the field of sexuality.  Using lubrication is not a bad thing.  It does not mean something is wrong with you if your vagina is not always as naturally lubricated as you would like it to …

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A New Look for Pelvic Exams

Ever wonder who invented the speculum, the handy tool used during pelvic exams to help open the walls of the vagina?  History tells us that something resembling a speculum was found during an archeological dig in Pompeii. However, in more modern history the first commonly used speculum appeared about 150 years ago and James Marion …

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