Therapy and Menstruation

As a therapist, I am often weary to ask my patients too many questions during our first visit. I know it is hard enough to open yourself up to someone new, and answer the many questions necessary to get to know someone in a therapeutic context. However, more and more I am starting to realize …

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Vibrators for the Holidays

Holiday shopping can be both fun, and stressful at the same time.  Many people want to get just “the right gift,” or making sure that the person will be surprised at the uniqueness of their gift.  So how about a vibrator?  There are literally hundreds of vibrators on the market, and numerous websites selling them …

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5 Myths About Vaginismus Debunked

There are so many myths surrounding Vaginismus, let’s try and bust them! Myth 1: VAGINIMUS is all “in your head.” Vaginismus is a condition where there is involuntary tightness of the vagina during attempted intercourse. The tightness is actually caused by involuntary contractions of the pelvic floor muscles surrounding the vagina.  Those muscles are in …

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GGG: Good, Giving, Game – Aren’t we All?

A young female patient of mine has started head first into the world of online dating. Besides the usual ups and downs of navigating that ever-changing landscape, she also had some questions and confusion on what some of the terms individuals use to describe themselves (in her case she is interested in heterosexual men).  She …

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Another Attack on Healthy Sexuality

There are numerous things that continue to surprise me as a therapist. I have worked with hundreds of sexual assault survivors for over ten years, and very few ever reported the assaults.  There are numerous reasons for that, but one reason that continues to shock me is the shame these individuals feel in disclosing the …

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Women’s Sex Toys: Made by Women for Women

The movement to get more women and girls into science and technology has created the successful STEM movement (Science Technology Engineering Mathematics), and the acronym STEM is becoming more and more popular and known nationwide. For centuries these fields have been dominated by men, however the last five years have shown real improvement in women …

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I Choose To Not Be Unhappy

While we cannot choose everything, we do or feel in life, we do need to remind ourselves that we do have the capacity to choose and regulate how we feel from moment to moment more than we might think.  Depression is real, and you cannot simply choose to “no longer be depressed.”  Therapy, medication and …

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Enjoying Sex with Vaginismus

So much energy and frustration is given to not being able to have intercourse with vaginismus, that many forget that sex is not just intercourse. While being treated for vaginismus and wanting to be able to have intercourse is a very important part of sexuality, there is more to sex than intercourse. Often, when I …

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