Enjoying Sex with Vaginismus

So much energy and frustration is given to not being able to have intercourse with vaginismus, that many forget that sex is not just intercourse. While being treated for vaginismus and wanting to be able to have intercourse is a very important part of sexuality, there is more to sex than intercourse. Often, when I …

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That’s What HE Said

I’m proud of our Vaginismus Forum. Vaginismus can be a heartbreaking condition to deal with and the shame around it adds some real salt to the wound.  So the fact that we have a place where people can go where vaginismus language is understood, it’s a drink of water in a desert of silence. Recently, …

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Out of the Box

Sigmund Freud was an Austrian neurologist and one of the most influential thinkers in the field of psychology today. Among his contributions to the field is the formulation of what are called ‘defense mechanisms’.  In lay terms, defense mechanisms are internal “security guards” inside of us whose goal is to protect us from experiencing pain and …

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Vaginismus: It’s Okay to Feel Angry

I have found something interesting while working with vaginismus patients. Many of them are angry. Most of them don’t seem angry when they first come in. They seem sad, hopeless, confused, and afraid. I most often have the urge to put my arms around them and say “It’ll be okay. I promise you.” But oftentimes …

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Coming Soon Live: Blogcast on Vaginismus

How do we combat an issue that nobody talks about? First step: We talk about it! Vaginismus is a condition where a woman can’t get a penis (finger, or tampon) into her vagina and is one of those issues that often lives in silence and shame.  Around here, vaginismus is household term, but in society it’s …

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The Vibrator and the Vaginismus Patient

Vibrators come in many shapes and sizes Vibrators for women come in many shapes and sizes. Many of our vaginismus patients have never seen or touched a vibrator, as it is very common for them to feel anxiety when thinking about using a vibrator for the first time. Most vibrators for women are designed to …

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Pregnancy and Vaginismus

Women with un-treated vaginismus wonder if it is possible for them to get pregnant if they are unable to have intercourse. If they do get pregnant, they then wonder if natural childbirth will cure their pre-existing vaginismus by stretching the vaginal opening. The truth is that some women with primary vaginismus have been able to conceive …

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