After speaking with many, many women and hearing their stories, I have found that some men and women are keeping track of their orgasms and only perform oral sex on a partner when they are guaranteed to get it in return. Or couples don’t perform oral sex on their partner at all because, “it isn’t fair [s]he gets to have an orgasm when I don’t!” It is important for everyone in the equation to be getting what they want.
Although it is important for both partners to experience orgasm, orgasms are not necessarily needed for a good time. Take turns some nights, focusing all the pleasure on one person; another night focus on the other. Try giving one partner oral sex, with nothing in return. Even though it is pleasurable to perform oral sex on someone, as the receiver, it is nice to know you can lay back and relax without the expectation that after you will give that person oral sex too. Sometimes is nice to just bask in the orgasm and enjoy the sensations to your skin and body.