“Private practice.”

I was trolling around blogland and came upon this creative and inviting post by Shaina Gaul on empowHER.com. She was blogging about women and orgasm, the dilemmas we have when our bodies don’t necessarily respond the way we want them to, even when with a person we love!

Shaina recommends “private practice” – yes, masturbation – as a way to explore our own bodies and providing release while we work on what works with our partners.

I then read a comment on another blog about a woman who was completely quiet during sex. She felt uncomfortable moaning , breathing heavily, reacting in front of her boyfriend.

And again, I thought: “private practice!” If she could practice being more responsive when she’s turning herself on, then pehaps she could become comfortable enough to react that way when she’s with her boyfriend.

And finally, I’ve been thinking about my two pre-teenage daughters. My brilliant friend Kari reminded me that “private practice” for teenagers allows them to fulfill their fantasies in a safe place, with no risk of pregnancy, STD’s or a broken heart. The mother in me exclaimed: “I’m all for that!”

So, if you don’ t have any particular bias against it, let’s exploit ‘private practice’ as a tool for exploring things we may not be able to do, or may not be completely ready to try in relationship prime time.

 

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