Nope, not talking about buyer’s remorse. I’m talking about what I hear from some women when I ask if they use a vibrator. These conversations go a little something like this:
“Well, I mean, I have one, but I don’t like it/I hate it/I don’t want anything to do with it”.
“Why – what do you think the barrier is?”
“He bought it for me”.
Some women just aren’t interested in toys. Others have tried but are not satisfied (because it’s likely not the right one for them). However, most of the time, the reason they avoid their partner’s gift is because it represents pressure. Pressure to engage sexually when they are experiencing low libido. So, purchasers of said vibe try to legitimately help the situation and don’t understand the rejection. The recipients of the swag become upset. And often, what comes next? N O T H I N G.
Why? Because we’re not raised to talk about sex with our partners and that’s just so counterproductive! If we don’t communicate our preferences and needs, we just dig ourselves deeper into a hole of dissatisfaction and bitterness.
Vibe selection is intensely personal. Some partners hit the jackpot and it all works out for the best. But if you are interested in choosing your own and have no idea where to start, or if you need help learning how to communicate with your partner about sex (or anything else!), please give us a call.
We can help you sort through it all so you can decide what’s right for you while you work your way back to healthy and satisfying sexuality. Contact us for a free phone consultation today!