Sex in the Media (Explore or Ignore): “Dummy”

I just completed the first 8 episodes of a brand new show (“Dummy”) on a brand new platform (Quibi), and I have a lot of thoughts. It’s loosely based on Executive Producer Cody Heller’s true-life experience with her true-life boyfriend. Whether or not you find it entertaining, I dare you not to be struck by the premise.

I’ll try to stop short of spoilers, but essentially: girlfriend discovers that boyfriend has a sex doll; girlfriend is at once taken aback and wildly curious. Girlfriend begins to question everything: “why does he need a sex doll? Am I not enough? What does she have that I don’t? Do I not have what it takes to satisfy him? Why should I care? I am enough.  Am I enough?”.  I’ll also share that the doll isn’t entirely inanimate, but I’ll leave it there for now. 

Before you think this is a “Lars and the Real Girl” reboot – caution: this series is super explicit (and does have some brief violent content in Ep 8). It definitely contains thought-provoking dialogue about modern feminism, confidence (and what knocks the air out of it), interpersonal communication, trust…all the stuff. And I’m still waiting for the release of 9 and 10, so I can’t comment on the series in completion. That said, the first couple of episodes are worthy of your time even if it’s just to soak up Anna Kendrick in all of her Anna Kendrick-ness and contemplate what you might do in such a situation. 

There’s a lot to unpack, but here’s one thing that definitely stuck with me: the notion that external sex aids (dolls, lube, vibrators, lingerie, music, candles, medication, etc.) can still, in this day and age, be so controversial, so scandalous, so offensive or even threatening. So what, if none of these items are not of the human body? They are FOR the human body. Why do we welcome ice or ibuprofen for injury, a warm bath or lavender sheet spray for comfort, a good book or something artistic for enlightenment, a glass of wine or cup of tea for relaxation? Doesn’t our sexuality deserve everything we give to other parts of ourselves? My vote is yes, yes it does! Of course, there are interpersonal considerations (and social and cultural ones, too). But open-mindedness and strong communication between partners will always cultivate and sustain the best of relationships. 

If you’re uninitiated and would like to dip your pinky-toe into the world of toys, etc., there are lots of resources out there. Need help deciding what would be right for you (and how to incorporate it into sexual engagement with your partner)? Review our list of recommended products, including our top vibrator picks. Trust us – there is something out there for EVERYONE (from the teeny-tiny all the way up to life-size).