I Guess That’s Why They Call It The Blues – Sadness After Sex Explained

Rolling like thunder under the covers may leave some women with the post-sex blues. Even when love making feels good and you are crazy about your partner, “postcoital dysphoria” can rear its head. The feelings can be sadness, depression, anger, and anxiety. They are especially confusing because you think that sex should leave you feeling relaxed, happy, and satisfied.

A small research study done by Dr. Robert Schweitzer on the subject found that about 46% of women run into this at least 1x in in their lives and 1% feel down after every sexual experience. Even though this seems so counter to our thinking when it comes to sex, it’s more common than we know. For many women the emotional experience that arises is likened to “homesickness.” There appears to be “no relationship between postcoital dysphoria and intimacy in close relationships.” Also, no correlation was found between sexual abuse and after sex sadness.

It isn’t a sign that your relationship is on the rocks and has to end. Certainly, consider if there’s something about this partner, the situation or “sexpectations,” and whether this is happening with all partners. Again, having postcoital dysphoria doesn’t suggest you have a screwed-up sex life, are broken, or bad at sex. It signals that certain feelings come up for you after sex, acknowledge them and let them pass.

Sexual health is an important part of life, whether you’re experiencing emotional difficulties or physical dysfunction, we can help. Call us for a free phone consultation.