Mom and Vibrator in the Same Sentence?

Times have changed. I mean, really, REALLY changed. When was the last time you saw a grown woman express her sexual frustration to her adult daughter on TV? Never? Well, enter one of (IMHO) the greatest series to ever hit the small screen – Jane the Virgin.

Things were so steamy in S5 E6 (Chapter 87 if you’re truly a fan) that New York Magazine’s Vulture Katherine VanArendonk noted “It was a pretty horny episode all around, in fact” (I suggest checking out her fabulous recap).

Of particular note was the scene mentioned above. Here you have a mother and daughter openly discussing the employment of a vibrator (and not just any vibrator, but one of the “egg varieties, which many women swear by”), as well as the name of a recent former president serving as sexual fantasy. Now, THAT’s some intriguing TV!!

What struck me about this wasn’t just the clever writing and brilliant performances, but that this scene was striking at all. The fact that conversations like these between parent and child rarely occur in America is pretty surprising considering, like, you know…it’s 2019! The contrast is so stark between how we approach sex education in the US vs. how it’s taught in many Scandanavian countries. In Sweden and Norway, for example, kids learn that pleasure is a normal, physiological response (and BTW – our teen pregnancy rates far surpass those nations that have much more progressive sex ed).

We trust our mothers for so many things and look to them for guidance and support. And yes, every parent-child relationship is unique, and we can’t forget that influencers like culture and personal comfort level play a role. But wouldn’t it be nice if there wasn’t so much shyness and shame around sex, and wouldn’t it also be nice (and normal) to approach the people we love not for just career advice or a recipe, but a frank talk about desire?

Don’t have anyone to talk to about what vibrator you should be using? Lucky for you, we have a great list of recommended products that can help get you started.