The Female Orgasm: 10 tips for your partner

Ever wonder how to communicate the intricacies of the female orgasm with your partner? Or, are you looking for tips on how to please your partner? Look no further. Here, we’ve round up 10 tips for you to use or share that can help to enhance the female orgasm

1. Start with her brain. Many women report that a sexual encounter starts way before the touching begins. Sometimes an email, a phone call, or support with something she needs is the best first step towards a good sexual experience.

2. Skin. Skin is the largest organ and touching is a great form of foreplay. Most women like to be touched many places other than their breasts and genitals, so start some place else and see what happens.

3. Slow. Slow is generally better than fast in terms of getting your partner in the mood and ready for sexual activity. Women rarely complain that their partners went too slow or that they were too gentle. That being said, you need to find each other’s speed and rhythm. Everyone is different but a slow and sensitive approach to your partner is generally a good one.

4. Mystery. In her book Mating in Captivity, Esther Perel explores and explains that sometimes the unknowable or mysterious aspects of a partner are what make them, or sexual activity, more exciting. She says that familiarity and comfort can sometimes breed boredom in the bedroom. This may not always be the case, but a sense of mystery or surprise can make things more exciting. Think of ways to reveal less. 

5. Change. Trying changing what you usually do. It is easy for all of us to fall into patterns in most aspects of our lives. Human beings generally oscillate between the comfort of patterns and the need for newness. Try new things and bring something new in to your typical sexual patterns and see what happens.

6. Avoid Myths. The number one myth I hear all the time is that women orgasm from intercourse, but the truth is that only 33% of women do, the rest do not. Don’t keep trying to make it happen in that way if it is not happening. There are so many other wonderful ways for women to have orgasms, so explore the ways that work best for you and your partner!

7. Communicate. Many people are so bored of hearing this one but it is true! Most of us are not mind readers so we need to hear from our partners what they like and dislike. Speak up and ask each other.

8. Time. Make Time. Sexual activity is a one of those things that can be pushed aside in our busy lives, but it can be the piece of a relationship that really keeps partners connected.

9. Skills. Many people view sex as something you should naturally be good at, but a lot of aspects of ones sexuality are learned. Read and ask questions. Good skills as a lover can not be underestimated.

10. Joy. Find the joy in pleasing her. I have a friend who says, “if the host is happy at the party…so are the guests.” The same can be said of sex – if you are having a good time pleasing her, chances are that feeling will be contagious.

Many women do not have any easy time having orgasms, in fact some women, never have orgasms. Sex can still be a pleasurable!

And…Get Help. If you or your partner are struggling with any sexual issues…get help. Low libido, difficulty having orgasms, or pain..are common. It is also very common for women to struggle with a sexual dysfunction at some point in their lives but there are great medical professionals out there.  Contact us for a free phone consultation.  We can help.

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