Cleaning Under the Rug

One of the most common challenges facing relationships is finding time and communication avenues to explore issues that are difficult to speak about. Consequently, issues get swept under the rug, though they continue to fester and prop up at various moments. 

Sex is one of those topics that couples struggle with creating a space to address together. We often meet people who have been in long-term relationships where they talk about everything under the sun, except for sex. It’s a scary topic for a relationship; it’s loaded with so much about who you are as a couple and as individuals as well.  It touches on issues like vulnerability, confidence, body image, perfection, anxiety, family backgrounds, education, fantasy, trauma, expectations, pregnancy, as well as many other issues. Perhaps this is why it’s hard to talk about sex; it’s more than just about sex, and one of the ways we protect ourselves from uncomfortable topics is by avoiding them. 

But when sex is addressed effectively, there is greater room for growth and increased enjoyment. If nothing changes, then nothing changes.