As a positive sexual advocate, I believe it is important for couples to continue having non-intercourse forms of sex. Many times couples still include non-intercourse forms of sex such as massage, using hands on each others genitals and oral sex, but only as a precursor to intercourse, or as “foreplay”. Many people in the sexuality field hate this term because it makes it sound as if intercourse is the big shebang and everything else isn’t real sex. With many of the women I come in contact with, when asked what they enjoy most, I am not surprised at the number of women who state they enjoy the non-intercourse forms more so than intercourse. And in most cases they do not own up to this comment, not even to their partners.
So to change your sex up and add some spice, try having oral sex not as foreplay but as the main event. It can be a pleasure at times to just focus on yourself and your own pleasure without worrying about how the other person is feeling. Keep in mind if you are doing it with a loving partner, they want you to experience pleasure without it being viewed that one person is selfish. And remember the next time it is your turn!