“Human lips enjoy the slimmest layer of skin on the human body, and the lips are among the most densely populated with sensory neurons of any body region. When we kiss the neurons, along with those in the tongue and mouth, rocket messages to the brain and body, setting off delightful sensations, intense emotions and physical reactions…Kissing unleashes a cocktail of chemicals that govern human stress, motivation, social bonding and sexual stimulation.” This quote is taken from an article in Scientific American Mind, written about kissing (published in 2008).
Many studies have shown that physical affection in general and kissing in particular can reduce stress, but it seems to me that kissing is a forgotten art. Not only is it fun…it reduces stress, reduces cholesterol, burns calories and…but it can help you and your partner stay together! I can certainly hypothesize on why many couples stop kissing but that was the subject of my last entry. In this entry I just want to encourage all of you to start doing it again.
If you or your partner really has forgotten how to kiss, there are always kissing lessons. You can contact William Cane (I have not met him and can not vouch for him professionally but I really like the idea), who has a book and a web site called “The Art of Kissing”. He also teaches lessons in kissing technique. A private lesson including 30 romantic techniques is just $155.
I generally treat women who have become disconnected from their partners. At The Medical Center for Female Sexuality we offer treatment in many ways, some of it is hormonal, with medication or with behavioral changes. We also offer couple’s therapy. Regardless of how we try to help, the intention of our treatment is to help people stay connected to themselves and to each other.
Kissing is a form of communication. Sex is another form. I don’t think it matters how you stay connected but I think it is vitally important that couples do stay connected. I have seen over and over again that with disconnection comes dissatisfaction and unhappiness — kissing is just one way to connect. Ultimately you must find the way that works for you.