[Lou84]

Hi Caitlin,

First of all, I want to say you are in great hands! Dr Pacik and his team are incredibly compassionate and knowledgeable – they have changed my life.

I’m single and was at the time of having my procedure in September last year. The opportunity for intercourse hasn’t arisen yet, and I’m still nervous at the prospect, because the last time for me was with my long-term boyfriend at the time (before I started having difficulties with Vaginismus). So I completely relate to your concerns about the first time.

But once you have the procedure and are able to dilate, I’m sure you will feel a lot less nervous about it. Before I had it done I couldn’t even allow myself to think about dating again, let alone sex. Now that I dilate every day, with ease, I feel like intercourse will just be a natural progression when the time comes. I think I’ll take a similar approach the previous post and say “it’s been a while”…this will both gauge his patience and let him know you need to take it slow. If he’s not willing to do that it’s better to find out early, before sharing something so personal and misunderstood.

I also just want to reinforce the importance of dilating – make time to fit it in, especially when you’re single. It keeps progress going (and anxiety at bay).

All the best for your procedure, it’ll be smooth sailing! 🙂

[Lou84]

I was just about to post a topic about this exact thing! But after reading everyone’s responses it feels good to know I’m not alone.

I’m two months post-procedure and this is the second period I’ve attempted to insert a tampon, because dilating is going so well. Both times it has been painful and difficult – this time I was able to get it in completely and walk around, but it was uncomfortable so I had to remove it.

Would you ladies advise trying a tampon with an applicator? I thought it might have been sore because I was a little dry (I’m obviously used to lube with the dilators) so I wondered if the applicator would be a smoother? Any tips on positions for insertion?

[Lou84]

Thanks Heather! And thanks for the great work you do on these forums – the support is absolutely invaluable! 🙂

That’s great to hear Lisa 🙂 so happy for you guys!

[Lou84]

I am so thrilled for you guys! CONGRATULATIONS!

Dilating Diva #2 xx

[Lou84]

Hi freespirited8484! I’m the same age as you and can completely relate to the pressure/desire to have children etc. All I can tell you is that this is the most amazing thing you could ever think of doing! Dr Pacik and his team are incredibly compassionate, understanding, knowledgeable, gentle and, most importantly, SUCCESSFUL! I went from having “maximum” spasm of the entry muscles, to now sleeping with a purple dilator in every night and dilating with the pink and blue (second-largest and largest) before bed. Considering I was never able to use a tampon this is an amazing feat!

I can also relate to your fear of penetration. I still have that familiar anxiety before I dilate, but now that I’m able to do it without pain it disappears. I spent so much time and money on appointments with physios, gynos and all different kinds of specialists over the years, but my advice is to save all of that and go see Dr Pacik. It’s a long way to travel but you’ll get your hope and confidence back x

[Lou84]

Hi Possum,

I’m also an Aussie going to see Dr Pacik for treatment (from Perth) and I completely understand and share your excitement! I was moving to Toronto in August anyway so have managed to book treatment in September. I lived in upstate New York a couple of years ago and it got very cold in December (especially by Australian standards!) so you’ll want to invest in a good insulated/puffy jacket, thermals and boots. Try one of the outdoors stores like Kathmandu or Anaconda (hopefully they have them in Queensland).

All the best for your treatment and good on you for making the trip! After 7 years of suffering I had also given up on ever having a normal relationship or family. It’s amazing what the power of hope can do! 🙂

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