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I’ve used estrogen cream before about 4 years ago, as I would have tearing at the 6 o’clock position. It actually helped a lot with that although sex was still painful anyway. (I’m having the tearing again now actually so maybe I should break mine out :-\) It’s good for rebuilding and strengthening the tissue down there. I’m not sure why he would give you that just for irritation though, to start with, as some formulations of it can be a touch irritating down there. Other than that there’s no harm in trying some, if you don’t like it you could use something else moisturizing – the Yes oil-based or just some almond/olive oil?

I had my physical today and the nurse offered to have the Pap done today too, so I said sure why not. I discussed the treatment with her and explained all the steps involved, and how Dr. Pacik became involved with it. My dr offered other speculums but I said the regular one should be ok, not like blue isn’t way bigger right? I didn’t dilate today but it was totally fine. I have to go back in a week for some blood tests, so I need to remember to bring a pamphlet! Totally forgot I had some! The more the merrier 😉

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I stack my birth control so that I start a new pack as soon as I run out of ‘active’ pills, which I did for my appt November – however, my body had other ideas and I started my period anyway. It really shouldn’t interfere with anything, it’s just a bit messy. They will have stuff at the office for you, and if you need any feminine products, there’s a drugstore nearby and in general pads/tampons are readily available in most stores.

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Congrats Allie and everyone else… and Nakita, we told you so 😉 LOL

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Congrats Alyx, I don’t think it’s ironic at all that it was Thanksgiving, I think that is a pretty fitting day for this for you 🙂

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This is from a previous post of mine from probably a few months ago now…

For everyone I would recommend reading “Taking Charge of Your Fertility” http://www.amazon.com/Taking-Charge-Fertility-Anniversary-Edition/dp/0060881909/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1334268114&sr=8-1 I used the Fertility Awareness Method (FAM) for over a year as birth control and it was very informative to know my cycle 110%. I think it would be a helpful and cheap way to pinpoint your ovulation (you don’t even really need the book, just a good thermometer and a free cycle charting site/app–I use femilia.com).

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Thanks a lot guys, it’s super close now and besides being excited I think I will most enjoy the *relief*–like I’ve been holding my breath for what, 8 or 9 years now, and I can finally exhale and be content. I should probably start packing my bike shorts! xD

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Thanks Heather, I am looking forward to it and I am glad the time has already gone so quickly 🙂 It will be a new beginning for everyone there and for this Election Day it’s time to vote vaginismus out of office for good!

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No worries I will be there with bells on… my MIL is a bit neurotic and as the driver she’s been asking me 🙂 Thanks Janet 🙂

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Hm ok looks like an extra early morning that day then 🙂 LOL Thanks!

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Obviously we can’t *tell* you how to feel, but, please don’t feel embarrassed at all about your very real, serious, and life-affecting condition. Some doctors I have seen have been nice, others clueless, and for the most part none were truly helpful. As many other people here will attest, there are way too many that are dismissive and either intentionally or unintentionally cruel. I was told at 17 to “relax and connect with your partner”… o_O Well gosh, I sure would love to but I can’t!

At that point I was still mostly unable to insert anything at all, although over the years I’ve achieved a degree of… penetrability? lol. Not that it’s much better on my part of the spectrum, as the pain can sometimes be excruciating. I remember flying to go visit a guy I had just started dating, and even with the lube I had brought (which freaked him out), insertion almost didn’t happen and then it was very painful, so I started crying (cue more freaking out!). So, I do DEFINITELY understand the embarrassment, but don’t feel totally discouraged just yet. As you will read here, there is a lot of hope and success and joy awaiting you.

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My procedure is scheduled for Nov. 6. She offered Oct. 23 as well but with hectic-ness lately I decided to just stick with the original date. Glad that you will be joining them that day Nakita! Happy for you guys and I know you’ll do great!

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I firmly believe that there is still much hope for you. Perhaps you are a bit older than the average lady that comes around here – but who knows, you could have another 20, 30, or 40 years with your husband still. That’s far too long to keep such sorrow and disappointment. We can’t change the past but we can keep trying to make positive changes, right? Sometimes it really feels too hard or even impossible, oh man does it ever. No one here would ever say your feelings are unjustified. BUT – If you can find it in you to take the risk, in the end I believe you will not regret it one bit. There will always be a cheering squad at hand here. o-(^_^o)

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Quote:

Quote from rachel on September 10, 2012, 16:27
I hear you frustrations loud and clear. We were in debt when we found Dr Paciks treatment and it was a tough decision to make. However, we decided to combine the trip for treatment with a mini holiday and we decided that the treatment was more important than the debt. I am over 2 years post botox and I do not regret going for the treatment. I still am paying off debt, as it seems that society keeps us indebt one way or another. Many people opt to go for IVF treatment because it becomes their only option to have a baby of their own. They don’t want the high costs and debt, but they follow it through because they know some things in life are more important. However, I do think you maybe need to cost everything out for your trip and work on a debt plan now for paying if off when you return home. We live in Canada and at the end of the year we were able to get some of the money back on tax. If you live in some parts of the USA, it covers it on some insurance plans. Another plan would be a loan that you have to pay back. What do you do for a job? Is there any chance of overtime? Seriously…if you remain without treatment you will probably find that you will end up throwing money away at counsellors with no results…i went through that for years. I was 11 years living with vaginismus and I came to a point where I knew that I needed to take drastic action. When it starts to affect your mental health…trust me it is not fun. I could have lost everything if I hadn’t got cured.

Is there anyway you could fundraise the money for yourself?? Over here they have parties where they raise money for honeymoons…i guess you could tell people you are raising money for a gynecological procedure. Most people won’t enquire into what the procedure it is when you say gynecological. Just a thought. Maybe everyone on this website needs to club together and start some fundraiser activities. That way we could have a fund ready for people like yourself who are struggling.

Yes I do have a number of friends in Canada so I have heard of those parties 🙂 I don’t live near my family or any of my old friends though. It’s about $500 for a plane from here to CA so I can’t see too many people showing up haha.

Overtime is an option, it’s a good idea (not trying to say it isn’t!) but part of the problem lately is my job. Since going full time, it has been the biggest source of stress in my life bar none. As in serious mental and physical health issues, and relationship issues. I try to put in extra hours when I feel up to it, but I truly need the time away. My only hope is that with our company’s growth I will get placed into a position that utilizes my strengths instead of aggravating my weaknesses. Despite my appearance I’m usually a pretty positive person but it’s been a bit rough this summer. Thank you again. The latest fad that I see on Facebook is my friends doing all these *runs* for things… I hate running but I hate vaginismus more. Maybe time to buy some running shoes!

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Unfortunately I turned 26 this year. At one time in the past my father offered to put me on his insurance again, and that was the last I heard of that. Another unfortunately, the people who I would consider telling and that would probably chip in some, are all not doing well financially themselves. My grandmother is stuck with my late uncle’s house that she can’t sell, and she is very ill. My mother just had surgeries herself, is on disability, was officially fired from her job, lost her home, and my MIL that found the treatment offered to pay for it… til she heard the cost, lol. She has her 90 yr old aunt living with her to help pay for stuff. My dad and my grandfather have plenty of money but they’re assholes 🙂 I don’t really have anyone else I’d feel comfortable telling, or asking for money, especially.

I just have wasted so much time and money on failed treatments, that I don’t feel comfortable with more prolonged uncertainty. I wish I’d saved the probably $2000+ I’ve spent in the past 5 or 6 years! I even had affordable insurance that covers the procedure, but lost it when I quit my job to go back to school. Just one of those things where you can’t do anything about it, but it still sucks. I have never expected any instant fixes, it’s fine if it takes time, but I’ve felt like a guinea pig for almost 9 years now. Or a human dartboard – throw a treatment at me and see what sticks! lol. For me, failure is not an option. I cannot and do not envision my life without overcoming this. So, there’s that 🙂 Thank you for your encouragement and support.

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I was put on Elavil (amitriptyline) for a few months as part of my “vulvodynia” treatment. If it helped any, I wasn’t able to tell. I did not actually get the side effect of weight gain, which is common for any psychopharmaceutical as seen above, but I definitely got every other side effect and then some. My hands shook, my mouth was horribly dry, I couldn’t sleep, my eyes became blurrier (already a bit nearsighted), I was also TMI constipated and unable to pee, I got frequent headaches, and had 0 drive to find out if it was helping my issue. After my dr didn’t issue me another refill, I simply had to quit cold turkey and suffered insomnia for several more months. I took sleeping pills every night, which allowed me to sleep, but left me still groggy and tired in the am. While it doesn’t make for the best comparison, as Elavil is not really used for depression and such these days, it definitely put me off ever trying prescription medication for my mental health also! Truly I am sorry TG that you have had to go through not only vaginismus and depression, but the hell that is the “cures” for them as well… I have been trying to find someone in my area recently, so I cannot personally attest to it, but I know many people who’ve had success with CBT. As with everything it seems, it can be costly, but I’m trying to find a therapist with a sliding scale 🙂 (gotta save up for -this- treatment too…)

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