[KarenK]

I was one of those people that had very little success inserting anything pre-procedure. I was never able to insert a tampon. I could have a gyno exam but it was extremely uncomfortable and painful – and could only be done with the “toddler” speculum. I had a little success with dilators here and there but could never get the angle right. The most successful thing I did pre-procedure was years of physical therapy with my wonderful PT, Andrea. She was absolutely wonderful and patient, and very careful to explain what was happening to my body. She had a real understanding of this condition, and she and I were able to have very meaningful conversations about it – which I believe led me to have more confidence and success with PT prior to this procedure. Once I found Dr. Pacik’s website, I discussed the treatment option with Andrea. She was 100% supportive – didn’t flinch one bit when I brought it up – and said she believed I was a good candidate for the procedure. She was very direct saying that 2 years ago I wouldn’t have been a good candidate, but we had come so far in my PT sessions, that she believed I was ready for this next step. She couldn’t have been more right. I had my procedure done almost a year ago now (December 16, 2013), and I consider myself completely cured of this condition. After the procedure, everything was so easy for me – from inserting the dilators at the correct angle to my PT sessions with Andrea to inserting tampons. Easy, easy, easy! And looking back, if I’m thinking of true elements of success for this program, it’s three things:
1) Having the guts to stand up – recognize the condition – and commit to the botox treatment (this is not easy – trust me – I know – I lived it)
2) Learning the correct angle to insert the dilators once the botox shuts down those muscles (sounds like a small detail but oh so important for me!)
3) Commit to dilating DAILY post-procedure. Every day. I remember something Dr. Pacik told me while in NH – 20 minutes is better than no minutes. So days when I knew I’d be busy – I’d slip one in while I was getting ready for work/blow drying my hair/etc. But dilating daily (2x) for at least three months post-procedure was absolutely key for me. Those muscles needed to be re-trained, the botox alone wasn’t going to cure anything, muscle memory needed to kick in and your brain needed to be re-trained too that it doesn’t hurt and insertion is possible. I cannot stress how absolutely critical this is. I mentioned it to Andrea one time – I looked at Dr. Pacik’s procedure as my “head start” to get ahead of this condition while the muscles were down. He delivered the “knock out punch” of those muscles for me, and now it was up to me to get them re-trained. The whole approach, with Dr. Pacik at my side the entire time via daily touch bases via email, is what truly equaled success for me. And if it worked for me – trust me – it can work for anyone.

[KarenK]

Congrats on scheduling your procedure, mlrchi! You are one step closer to completely overcoming. You will do great, and I promise you it will be life-changing. Good luck, and please know we are all here to support you!

[KarenK]

Thanks zenely and Heather! We are beyond happy and excited. In terms of positions, I have a slightly tilted pelvis which was discussed with Dr. Pacik while we were in NH for the procedure. Obviously we are still working on which positions work best but what definitely worked for me was scooting myself to the edge of the bed while laying on my back and my husband standing. Again, no pain whatsoever and I could use my hand to help guide to the correct angle. I am still in complete shock.

[KarenK]

Hi nina – you have come to the right place. We are all here to support and encourage you. I am so thankful that you found this forum, as the ladies on here know exactly what you are going through. So many of us have gone to doctors that have no idea what to do or what to tell us. Have you found a doctor in your area that really understands vaginismus? I know you mentioned you saw a doctor that diagnosed you with the condition, but I’m concerned about the little information that was provided to you. Finding a doctor who was really knowledgeable about the condition really helped me to actually discuss the condition. You can do all the online research you want, but actually speaking to another human being who was knowledgeable really helped me. I was referred to a physical therapist who continued to help me emotionally. Then I found this website and Dr. Pacik – Dr. Pacik is by far the most knowledgeable clinician on vaginismus that I have ever come across. Welcome to the forum and let us know how else we can help!

[KarenK]

Thank you Heather and Nakitalab for your kind words! I greatly appreciate – and both of you for the unrelenting encouragement you give to everyone in this forum. The world needs more people like you 🙂
vgfears – I still have complete control over my PC muscles – the difference is they are not “blocking” entry anymore. The “gatekeeper” muscle (that’s what my PT and I call it) has been shut down and has basically waved the white flag and given up. It is such, such a relief for me – as this muscle was my biggest obstacle. Once through that stubborn PC muscle, everything was fine – no pain whatsoever. You too will get there – I promise. If I can do this, anyone can do this. I felt helpless for over a decade because I just couldn’t find a gyn who knew what the heck was going on and quite honestly, it took me too long to find Dr. Pacik! I SO wish I would have found him earlier. But I thank God that I did finally find him. I am 48 days post-procedure now. Virtually zero pain while dilating and this week I dilated up to the #6 which was a huge step. I feel like I’m getting so close to overcoming. I am determined now more than ever!

One last thing I wanted to mention – since I forgot to mention it in my longer message above – is Dr. Pacik’s book. I cannot tell you how much it helped both my husband and I to read his book. I had ordered books online before about vaginismus, painful sex, strict upbringings, etc. etc. but never before had I read a book that hit so close to home. It’s like he wrote that book specifically for me (I know he didn’t 🙂 but it truly felt that way). I was completely blown away, and this is really what gave me the extra boost of confidence I needed to book my procedure with him. No matter how scary it sounded. Looking back now, it was probably one of the best decisions I’ve ever made in my life. Good luck and please let me know if I can provide any other information to you!

[KarenK]

Hello, I feel so bad that I haven’t posted anything in this forum until now! Thank you for making us feel so welcome Heather. I am having my procedure on December 16, which is hard to believe is only 2 weeks away. I’m so ready to tackle this head on. I have been doing pelvic floor PT with a wonderful physical therapist for over 2 years now and feel this should be my final step (fingers crossed!!). I’ve been dealing with both the emotional and physical pain that naturally comes with this condition for 15 years so the trip up to NH almost seems surreal. I look forward to meeting Dr. Pacik and his team – everyone I’ve encountered so far have been wonderful.

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