[sarah25]

I know this is an old post but I have just seen this and think pampering yourself is a fantastic idea! I will defiantly be trying this , thanks Rachel 🙂

[sarah25]

Thanks Valentina. Small steps are just as important though, as you say, thats how it starts 🙂

[sarah25]

Thank you both.
Before the treatment I was getting tired of trying to be excited about a ‘holiday’ when I was actually anxious about the treatment, so in the week before I left the UK I just started telling the truth and every time I was blown away by the positive responses although I never went into much detail.
After the treatment though I felt like I NEEDED to tell people, I am sure my courage came from finally feeling like I have some control after the botox treatment (Thank youDr Pacik!). I am also surprised by the number of people who have vaginismus or who know someone who has.

[sarah25]

Hi all, just thought I would update quickly. The procedure went well and I can now dilate up to the #6 dilator 3days post procedure, with minimal discomfort!
I do have a UTI which is driving me mad. I am taking antibiotics and drinking lots of water but it seems to be stinging more than ever! I am still dilating but the UTI makes me feel as though I don’t want to, in fact I don’t want to do anything, which is a shame as we are in Boston.
UTI aside though I am really pleased 🙂

[sarah25]

Quote:

Quote from Janet Pacik on March 31, 2014, 04:52
Hi sarah25 — I am very sorry that no one contacted you. You should have definitely been contacted by someone on our staff. I did check with Dr. Pacik and your appointment time is 9:30 a.m. We are looking forward to seeing you then. Janet Pacik

Hi Janet, thats ok, I’m just pleased to know a time. Thank you

[sarah25]

Panicking now.
I have no idea what time I need to be at the centre. I know the appointment is 8:30 so going by the examples I’m assuming I have to be there by 7am but I am not sure 😕 . If anyone does see this please let me know.
Thanks

[sarah25]

Sorry didn’t mean to panic you! It’s just to determine the extent of the pain/ anxiety I think.
Haha that’s a good thing to focus on 🙂

[sarah25]

We are in La Quinta Inn & Suites.
I’m sorry to hear that you lost your Mom, that must have been horrible.
I trying to avoid thinking about the dilation, the initial examination terrifies me enough! Just try to remember that we will have general anaesthetic so won’t feel much, that’s what is keeping me sane.
I was having problems with my sleep and the doctor gave me sleeping tablets, I don’t like using them though.
Last night I could barely sleep, I finally got to sleep at about 1am and had to be up at 5am to travel here, so I am exhausted. We are staying in the hotel tonight and getting take away, I have been feeling sick but I eat when I’m stressed, haha.
I have mouth ulcers too, which I get when I am feeling stressed or run down.
But other than that, I made it this far so it can see a light at the end of the tunnel -albeit a distant and dim one

[sarah25]

I’m in Boston!! We are driving to Manchester NH right now.
Rachel I’m nervous too but that’s ok we can be nervous together!
What hotel are you staying in?

[sarah25]

Hi ladies,
My procedure is in two weeks!
I’m not even sure how I am feeling, I am so nervous and at the same time excited that this could be it. I have started getting my things together for the trip and can not believe that the day is nearly here; how I am going to focus at work the next week or so is beyond me.
How is everyone else doing? Anyone else due to have their procedure on the week of the 31st March?

[sarah25]

Hi ladies, I am currently in the process of arranging everything to go to get treatment in March of this year. For me the reasons for the delay have been:
1) Financial, I am in the UK so no health insurance and I am also a student.
2)Fear of failing (again)
3)Ignorance of others who have tried to encourage me to exhaust other options here in the UK (therapy, dilation etc)
4)The belief that it would somehow get better by itself.
5)Concern that my university would not understand and allow me time off for the procedure
6)Professionals telling me it is ‘all in my head’ leading me to question how botox would even work
7) Fear of battling with my anxiety around intimacy AFTER the procedure
8)The fear of dialating

[sarah25]

Congratulations on being approved as adopters, I hope the matching process happens quickly for you.

I was extremely open with the adoption social worker but it felt as though she wasn’t willing to listen at all. She insisted that our relationship can not possibly be stable if we are not able to have a physical relationship and she also couldn’t get her head around why I would want to adopt when I can have biological children-in theory.
She promised to call last Friday but has not.

I think I find it all the more frustrating as I am in my final year of studies to become a social worker and I see daily the shortage of adopters, the children wishing for parents and the parents failing their children.

I was sexually abused in my childhood and have requested counciling but have to wait until the investigation is finished to access it (I reported it in June) I have also requested sex therapy but have to wait until March just for an initial consultation. Everything is so slow!

I am angry that I am forced to wait to start the adoption process when none of the reasons are my own fault and I am doing everything I can to resolve them.
I am pleased to hear of someone who has made it this far though so thank you for your reply.

[sarah25]

Hi all,
I’m a thrilled to be here, I know that sounds bizarre but I am fed up of talking to people who just don’t get it.
My name is Sarah I’m 25 and have been diagnosed with vaginismus for four years…well that is when I received the initial diagnosis. Since then doctors have fine various (painful and uncomfortable) tests to check for other causes, but the results only echo that I do indeed have vaginismus.
I married my husband in May 2012, we had sex almost 3years prior and had had a completely normal sex life.
I live in the UK and have constantly struggled to find support, I have been promised referrals to vaginismus specialists and sex therapists but only ever receive referrals to couples counseling which frustrates me!
I have bought dilators and can insert #3 after an hour of discomfort and patience but each time I am filled with fear and hate the process.
We have paid almost £2000 for hypnotherapy that had very little effect on the vaginismus but thankfully allowed me to open up more to my husband. That said I still avoid intimacy despite wishing with all my heart that I didn’t.
This year I have reported a man who sexually abused me in my childhood (although not rape), part of my reason for reporting him was in the hope that it would in some way help with the vaginismus. No such luck…yet.

My husband and I are currently looking into adoption because I am terrified that even when the vaginismus is under control, childbirth will send me straight back to square one. I am honestly ok with adopting, in fact I was very excited until the social worker completely misunderstood vaginismus and suggested our relationship wasn’t strong enough. In fact our relationship is stronger than ever and I couldn’t wish for a more supportive husband.

So here we are, after nearly 2years of consideration I have completed the forms for Botox treatment and will email them off today. I know very little about the costs associated but we will cross that bridge when we get there.

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