Spontaneous Sex

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  • #8449
    mmHeather34
    Moderator

    Hi ladies. My hubby and I have a healthy and happy sex life now. However, I still feel the need to dilate sometimes before sex. For those who have also overcome, how long did it take before you could have pain-free spontaneous sex (i.e. sex without dilating first)? Were you nervous at first in doing this? How long did it take to become comfortable with it?

    #9776
    salvarez91
    Participant

    To me, having spontaneous sex is what works best for me. If I dilate just to have sex and I know I only dilated to have sex, I start panicking and then it just doesn’t go to well. I just dilate daily while my boyfriend Juan is at work. Then if whenever we do have sex it always works out, it’s not planned, I am just confident it will be enjoyable and fun because I dilated earlier and daily just like I was told. So, maybe you just need to relax and be confident in yourself 🙂 . Having pain free spontaneous sex was achieved 25 days post procedure.
    3/3/12- It was around midnight when Juan was sleeping, and I took the opportunity to just get on top of him and see if I would be able to be successful in achieving intercourse. For the first time, I started to feel like I was normal for once. It was something so spontaneous and different for us. But it worked, we where so happy!
    It is especially fun if you try it while your husband is sleeping, I am sure he will LOVE it! Oh and another thing, I always make sure I have lots of lube!…the more the better 😉

    #11980
    mmHeather34
    Moderator

    This is a great post ladies and is being revisited because Becca recently had a question regarding would a treated patient have to use the dilators forever? This was a very good question Becca and made me also think about spontaneous sex. For the longest time, I had to prepare in advance of intercourse with my husband, including dilating for 2-3 hours as I became used to this and it felt comfortable. We both wanted it to someday be spontaneous but didn’t know how to get there. Then, we went on a very, very good date; returned from dinner; and just went for it without dilating in advance. I was a little nervous but he made me feel so comfortable and I trusted him completely. It didn’t hurt at all and was actually quite pleasurable. From that point forward, we stopped using the dilators prior to intercourse and then had spontaneous sex. Ladies, what have been your own experiences regarding spontaneous sex and not having to use the dilators in advance post-procedure? What advice would you give a newly treated patient regarding the time-frame for this and how it happened for you?

    #11985
    Becca
    Participant

    Thank you Heather! Yeah, I really do just want to be able to have spontaneous sex like a normal person (well, I would gladly just take sex at all right now). 🙂 I would love to hear more about what others have to say about this too.

    #11996
    mmHeather34
    Moderator

    This definitely will happen for you post-procedure Becca. I never dreamed I would ever be able to have sex, let alone spontaneous sex. This past weekend, my hubby and I attended a convention together and I didn’t even pack the dilators for the trip. We simply enjoyed some of our toys (Candy Stick and Lelo Liv vibrators) and had pain-free and pleasurable intercourse in our hotel room. I feel like if I can do it after never dreaming of being able to and never even being able to insert a q-tip, anyone will be able to do this post-procedure. Ladies, who else has transitioned to having spontaneous sex with your partner/husband (i.e. w/o dilating in advance)? What tips or advice do you have for patients when transitioning to this?

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