New Self Magazine article on Painful Sex

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    There seems to be more and more momentum about getting the word out that sex should not hurt.
    A new article in Self magazine again encourages women to realize that sex should NEVER be painful.


    Thanks for posting that Nicole. As a gyn healthcare provider, I come across women all the time that are surprised to learn that sex doesn’t have to be painful. The more articles there are about, the more people talk about it, the easier it will be for women to realize that sex can be better, and to seek the treatment they need.


    Here is the link to that article you mentioned, Nicole:

    It’s funny actually that you linked to the one about misconceptions we get about love from movies – I think these are related concepts. About both love AND sex culture embeds insidious ideas that are tough to shake off since they came to us so young. In particular myths about virginity (especially that first-time sex should be painful for the woman) create a lot of confusion for many women and often delay diagnosis and treatment for painful sex.

    I hope that in future we see cultural examples that are more accurate and less fanciful – as fun as romantic comedies, for example, can be, they build a bad bedrock for real understandings of relationships.


    Man, this article is one of the best I’ve read about vaginismus/pain with sex in a while! It’s informative, relatable (especially for us!) and has great suggestions at the end (like about being vocal with your partner about the pain).

    I linked sex with pain in my mind for years (even before trying it), which definitely contributed to my vaginismus.

    Thanks for sharing!

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