Hi prettychic – I’m so sorry you had that experience, but it’s a VERY familiar one for those of us with vaginismus or other vaginal pain disorders that have been through some rough treatment by the medical industry before. It’s sad how common it is for doctors (even female ones) to dismiss serious pain as someone just “freaking out” and to act as though that isn’t the symptom of a potential problem! You are NOT abnormal for having this reaction and scores of women would tell you the same thing.
I can’t remember the process of setting up a pap smear under sedation myself because my mom arranged it for me when I was in college, but I would recommend calling various gynecologists and women’s health clinics in your city, telling them you think you have some kind of vaginal pain disorder like vaginismus, and asking if they do pap smears under sedation. This might also be useful to assess which gynos will be more sympathetic to you – hopefully you can find one that’s familiar with vaginismus or maybe even has treated it before and you could also get some advisement on that if you’re interested in pursuing treatment. I hope there is a sympathetic clinic nearby, but calling around will hopefully save you some trauma of having bad in-person appointments!