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  • #23877

    Hi there,

    I’m having success with dilating and am able to insert all sizes. However, I have been consistently using the dilators for about an hour each night for the past two months and still have pain when inserting the largest two sizes. This seems to be the sticking point for me. I want to transition to sex, but am I supposed feel no pain with dilation before trying? Any tips for getting over the hump of the largest dilators? I worry this is as good as it will get for me.

    Thank you!


    Hi Jac1234,

    Congratulations on successfully working all the way up to the largest dilators.

    For some women the largest size dilator does always give some slight burning or discomfort. As long as your partner is slightly smaller than the larges size dilator, I would say it is ok to try intercourse.

    I would dilate with the largest size prior to intercourse.

    I find that some dilators are not completely pain free until you can insert a dilator bigger than it. So unless you continue to work up to further bigger sizes, that last dilator size could still be a little problematic.

    The glass dilators from crystal delights do have bigger sizes, and the size 7 and 8 can be really helpful when you have a large partner.

    Hope this helps,



    Hi Melissa,

    Thank you so much for your response! That all makes sense and is in line with what I was thinking, so it’s very helpful to have confirmation. I was worried because I was still feeling some pain, but it is a relief to know that I’m not doing something wrong after all! I will keep using the dilators and work around the sizing to hopefully transition soon.

    Thanks again!


    Jac1234, I think that’s TOTALLY normal! I used the pure romance set of dilators and the big pink one NEVER felt totally comfortable, but it was also comically large and bigger than most penises one would encounter in the wild. As long as you can still insert them reasonably well, I wouldn’t be too worried!


    Thank you for the feedback! So helpful to know I’m not alone in this! Dilating feels like a foreign world sometimes, so knowing that others have experienced the same is so valuable.

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