Anyone else alone in this cause of a strict Catholic family who are against sex?

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    My name is Lulu, I am 20yr old. I found out about my vaginismus last month which I had for a year, I just started PT treatment. I am really scared because I only have my Boyfriend to help me through it, I was not able to afford continuing PT appointments, so I had to lie to my mom to have two with my PT and she gave me what I need for treatment. I was shamed and called immoral and deeply sinned when my parents found out I got chlamydia last summer so I am so scared they will know about my sex life and more with my sexual problems. Thank goodness for my amazing boyfriend who has been great about it, he encouraged me to it. I feel bad for him that I am not normal, I have been treated for 3 yeast infections, 2 UTI’s, Chlamydia and twice for BV, so it ruined me and caused vaginismus, but also my previous Catholic beliefs about sex being a sin, it felt wrong at first and I was scared, it took about 7 months to get over it because it is what I wanted but It also caused Vaginismus. I feel so alone with all this, so I reached out to this blog.
    Anyone have any tips???


    Hi Lulu1802, I’m so sorry to hear about all the pain you’ve been through! First of all, I want to say that the issues you’ve had with STDs and yeast infections are not because you are a bad person – everyone’s bodies are different and some women just have extra sensitive vaginal chemistry that makes them more prone to these types of infections. It would probably be worth seeing a gynecologist just to discuss the variety of issues you’ve had and see if there are methods of treatment available.

    I wasn’t raised catholic, but I WAS brought up in a household where sex was strongly discouraged and I believe it definitely contributed to my vaginismus because it added further stress and doubt to sexual situations that might not have been there otherwise. Vaginismus can form for all kinds of reasons – it’s also common among anxious people who happen to carry their tension in their vaginas – and knowing these factors are at play can help you to understand what you need to work on to achieve a healthier sex life.

    I think your first steps should be to meet with a gynecologist to see if they can shed any light on your tendency toward infections/UTIs and also perhaps consider dilating if you aren’t doing that already. Remember that this is about YOUR body and it isn’t your family’s business. This is a hard thing for us to assert as we grow up but you’re becoming an adult and will need to draw these boundaries in future more and more. i hope this helps and that you get relief soon!

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