[Emdeejay]

Hi
I have recently started dilating also. I can confirm that for me it’s also an up and down process, I find that one day I’ll be able to insert with little difficulty and the next day will be totally different, I’ll come up against a “wall”, sometimes with some muscle spasms. I find it helps to dilate after a shower or bath, and I put on a comedy show to have something else to focus on. I also tried CBD oil which I was dubious about but did have a small good effect. If I’m having a particularly stressful or tense day I skip dilating as I know it’ll be difficult and I’ll feel like giving up.
Keep at it though, I never thought I would make the progress I have. My gyno called me the “worst case he’d ever seen” of vaginismus, so if I can do it, you can 🙂
Em

[Emdeejay]

hi recessivegenequeen

Thanks so much for your replies, you seem to have so much insight and wisdom about these things. I am coming to the realisation myself that my relationship with my body is complicated and probably always will be. You’re probably right that I should stop focussing on finding a reason why I developed vaginismus and put my efforts into progressing with my recovery.
Some more good news is that my physical therapist appointment was really really positive, and I now have an official treatment plan, and I’m feeling hopeful.

Thanks again
Em

[Emdeejay]

Thank you so much for replying and sharing
It’s taken me until my thirties to deal with this and I think the fact that I’ve kept it inside for so long has meant that now I’m seeking help, the emotion has erupted out of me, if that makes sense. I have also confided in 2 close friends about this, and already it seems less like a shameful secret, it feels like the more I let it out, the more the issue shrinks.
I saw my GP yesterday as a follow up to my gyno, and she has referred me to a gynaecological physiotherapist, so I will keep working with the dilators until I get that appointment.
I am based in the UK so the health system is a little different, counselling and therapy are harder to come by for an issue like this, and waiting lists are long unless I went private and paid (something I would consider in the future), so for now I’m pushing forward with dilating and reading stories on this forum and online to keep me motivated.
I wish I had dealt with this years ago, I wish I had known this help was here

Em

[Emdeejay]

Hi
Thank you for replying, this is all really helpful, especially as my gyno didn’t really give much instruction. I am now working with the 4 1/2 inch dilator and I am hitting difficulties but the good news is my anxiety is getting better and instead of giving up and going back into denial I’m keeping with it. I’m currently dilating between 10 and 20 mins a day. It’s the deepest muscles that are causing problems but hopefully in time I’ll get there

Thanks 🙂

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