Jonathan,
Thank you so much for sharing your story, I understand this must be hard for you to get through and I know most men usually don’t share these kind of intimate problems because they feel like they are the only ones with these issues.
I can assure you that is not the case since I went through similar issues with my husband. One of the main problems we had was lack of communication – not that we didn’t talk, but SEX was something neither one of us could talk about freely. That created a lot of misunderstandings and problems, certainly in the beginning. And I recognize myself for 100% in what your wife did: delaying sex, asking your partner to try again the next evening, wich only leads to more frustration. Each time we went through the full cycle of getting each other excited during the day, lots and lots of foreplay and once I was fully ready… well, sorry, nope, not working, we’ll try again tomorrow. And that is something that might be okay for women, but I’ve learned men can really suffer from this so I think it is fantastic your partner helped you out and gave you an orgasm on those occasions.
It’s an unknown fact but almost all partners from vaginismus patients end up with some kind of sexual dysfunction, either it being the ejaculation coming too soon or too late, or the inability to have or sustain an erection. Don’t give up, it’s normal for your body to take a while to adapt. Keep on trying. I’m sure it’s going to turn out ok!
