The First Call – What questions did you ask Dr. Pacik?

Home Forums Vaginismus Support Group Tips for Future Vaginismus Patients The First Call – What questions did you ask Dr. Pacik?

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    Hi ladies. I was recently asked what questions I asked Dr. Pacik in my first phone call with him. In thinking about this, I remember asking the following questions:

    1) Are there any side effects that I may get from the Botox?
    I was terrified of this and found out that it was an unfounded fear. I had no side effects whatsoever post-procedure.

    2) I’m afraid I won’t be able to do the dilating? What guarantees that I will be able to use dilators after the procedure when I’ve never ever even inserted a q-tip?
    He very genuinely explained the procedure to me (i.e. progressive dilation under anesthesia) and then practicing with the dilators thereafter. I listened intently but didn’t necessarily believe him until it happened. Once I woke up with the dilator inside, took it out to use the bathroom, and inserted it right back in, for the first time in my life, I knew that something was able to be inside of me pain-free and it flipped a switch for me entirely. It also helped so much that the dilators were not the hard white plastic ones from but the colored silicone ones from pure romance. And, I liberally (very, very liberally) used a combination of surgilube and lidocaine mixture on the dilators which made them that much easier to slide in, remove, and re-insert.

    3) How much will my husband be involved in the treatment?
    I am not sure how others feel about this at all and how much you want your husband/partner to be involved. For me, I was just so nervous with the idea of my husband being in the procedure room and dilation thereafter. Dr. P will explain and talk to you in-depth about this and see what you are the most comfortable with. I ended up having my husband by my side with the dilators but not in the actual procedure room which worked fine for us.

    4) What will happen when we are in NH for the two days?
    Dr. Pacik will explain day 1 – procedure day and the day to begin practicing with dilators. Then, he will explain day 2 – the counseling day and continued practice with dilators. Day 2 was the day that my roomie, another woman with vaginismus, really bonded and talked for close to 5 hours about everything and anything. She was the first person that I had met who also had vaginismus and it was kind of surreal and very cool to feel less isolated (this is well before the creation of the Forum) and I had always been secretive with my girlfriends.

    5) What will the aftercare be like following my procedure?
    Here, Dr. Pacik will explain about the daily dilation log and how important it is to use this. This is basically a record of the time you use each dilator and also your anxiety levels. For example, day 3 could be “dilated with purple for 30min/dilated with pink for 30min/dilated with blue for 30min and anxiety was 3-4 on scale of 1-10” or something similar. This is such an awesome part of the program because it keeps you accountable for your own progress and also helps Dr. Pacik to know how you are doing and to adjust the dilating schedule accordingly.

    For the veterans reading this, what advice do you have for the women who will be making their first call to Dr. Pacik? What questions did you ask during your first call?


    I wonder what prompted this topic? 😉
    I have not yet had the procedure (few more days!) so I can’t call myself a veteran, but I did just have the call with Dr Pacik last week. One of the questions I asked him was how long I would have to be in Manchester. I had read conflicting accounts – some two days, some three. Dr. Pacik explained the difference, saying that both reports were correct. Depending on the severity of the vaginismus, especially anxiety level, Dr Pacik may have you stay the third day, to make sure you are comfortable with dilating and to make sure you “own” the dilation process. He also further explained that some patients simply choose to stay the third day because of the good energy between patients. This makes so much sense. So many ladies have felt so isolated because of their condition and are happy to spend another day with women who have “been there”. 🙂

    I also asked another question that I am sure is a frequent one. What if I get/have my period on the day of the procedure? Dr. Pacik explained that it does happen, and while annoying and messy, the procedure can still be performed. Stress and anxiety levels can cause some ladies to start their periods much earlier than expected – so even if you don’t expect your monthly friend, be prepared for her in case she decides to pay a visit. 🙂


    I found that I asked Dr. Pacik a lot of questions about contingency plans “in case I am the rare exception for which nothing works.” The best thing was that he patiently answered all of my questions and assured me that, to my surprise, he is asked many of these questions by many of his patients. What a relief that conversation was!

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