Hitting a plateau

[alexandra]

Hi all!

I’m new to this forum — not sure where the appropriate place to post this would be!

I’ve been diagnosed with vaginismus for almost four years now. I got a Botox procedure in August (it was not at Maze) and have seemed to hit a plateau in my progress. I am dilating every day, along with pelvic floor physical therapy once per week. It has been 5 months since my procedure, and I still have not moved up a size with dilators. I’m feeling extremely frustrated and discouraged, as I feel that I should have moved up a size by now. To be clear, I did not do any treatments prior to the Botox, so I’m not sure if this has anything to do with it. Does anyone have any recommendations as to what to do when you hit a wall with your progress? Has anyone else experienced this? I know every body is different but I would love to hear your thoughts!

Best,
Alexandra

[mazemelissa]

Hi Alexandra,

Just wondering if you had progressive dilation under anesthesia along with the Botox, and if during the procedure they provider you saw was able to insert the largest dilator at that time? At Maze we always make sure that the largest dilator is possible to insert, and that the vaginal entrance will stretch to accommodate that size, even if the patient will need to work up to it after the procedure. We like to do this to make sure the hymenal ring is not in any way a barrier for dilation, especially in women who have never had any penetration. Sometimes, even if they hymen is not intact, it can be partially intact and still be a little bit of a barrier for dilation, so we make sure the largest dilator will be possible to insert.

What size dilator are you currently using, and which set?

Also, Some dilator sets have large jumps between sizes, and sometimes you need to find an in between size to help slowly stretch little by little. Going to big too quickly can be painful and unsuccessful.

I think it is great that you are seeing the PT weekly, have you asked the PT to insert the dilators for you? Sometimes having some help with insertion up to a new size can be very helpful. The first time you move up in size is always more stressful and painful, having someone do that for you can work for some people.

Don’t get discouraged, and continue to dilate as much as you can with the dilator you are able to insert. Try to move it side to side and roll it around to stretch more. You can even try sleeping with a dilator over night, and then try to insert the larger size in the morning after having the smaller dilator in all night stretching.

Hope this helps. Melissa

[Jennifer Dembo, LMSW]

Hi Alexandra,

Thanks so much for sharing your experience with us, and Melissa provided some great advice above. Since I approach sexual issues from the behavioral camp, I’m wondering if you might be experiencing any barriers like anxiety or fear when you try to graduate to a larger dilator. As I like to say to our patients here at Maze, “no one wakes up every day and says – yea for me…I get to dilate today!” Believe me, we get it. However, there are steps you can take to maximize your comfort during your sessions and even make the time pass more quickly (i.e. a juicy Netflix binge distraction or relaxation exercise practice, etc.). If you would like more suggestions, just let us know!

Keep up your strong, brave work and keep us posted!

[Jennifer Dembo, LMSW]

Hi Alexandra,

Thanks so much for sharing your experience with us, and Melissa provided some great advice above. Since I approach sexual issues from the behavioral camp, I’m wondering if you might be experiencing any barriers like anxiety or fear when you try to graduate to a larger dilator. As I like to say to our patients here at Maze, “no one wakes up every day and says – yea for me…I get to dilate today!” Believe me, we get it. However, there are steps you can take to maximize your comfort during your sessions and even make the time pass more quickly (i.e. a juicy Netflix binge distraction or relaxation exercise practice, etc.). If you would like more suggestions, just let us know!

Keep up your strong, brave work and keep us posted!

[Jennifer Dembo, LMSW]

Hi Alexandra,

Thanks so much for sharing your experience with us, and Melissa provided some great advice above. Since I approach sexual issues from the behavioral camp, I’m wondering if you might be experiencing any barriers like anxiety or fear when you try to graduate to a larger dilator. As I like to say to our patients here at Maze, “no one wakes up every day and says – yea for me…I get to dilate today!” Believe me, we get it. However, there are steps you can take to maximize your comfort during your sessions and even make the time pass more quickly (i.e. a juicy Netflix binge distraction or relaxation exercise practice, etc.). If you would like more suggestions, just let us know!

Keep up your strong, brave work and keep us posted!

[Jennifer Dembo, LMSW]

Hi Alexandra,

Thanks so much for sharing your experience with us, and Melissa provided some great advice above. Since I approach sexual issues from the behavioral camp, I’m wondering if you might be experiencing any barriers like anxiety or fear when you try to graduate to a larger dilator. As I like to say to our patients here at Maze, “no one wakes up every day and says – yea for me…I get to dilate today!” Believe me, we get it. However, there are steps you can take to maximize your comfort during your sessions and even make the time pass more quickly (i.e. a juicy Netflix binge distraction or relaxation exercise practice, etc.). If you would like more suggestions, just let us know!

Keep up your strong, brave work and keep us posted!

[Jennifer Dembo, LMSW]

Hi Alexandra,

Thanks so much for sharing your experience with us. It sounds super frustrating.

Melissa provided some great advice above, certainly. Since I approach sexual issues from the behavioral camp, I’m wondering if you might be experiencing any barriers like anxiety or fear when you try to graduate to a larger dilator. As I like to say to our patients here at Maze, “no one wakes up every day and says – yea for me…I get to dilate today!” Believe me, we get it. However, there are steps you can take to maximize your comfort during your sessions and even make the time pass more quickly (i.e. a juicy Netflix binge or relaxation exercise practice, etc.). If you would like more suggestions, just let us know.

Keep up your strong, brave work and keep us posted!