[Ella_Belle]

Thank you for all the great advice Heather, I really appreciate it. I am making an appointment with a local pelvic floor physiotherapist who has experience in treating vaginismus. I am able to get the 3rd size of dilator in and leave it in for 10 min now. I think you are ready when you are ready, and it’s okay to be at whatever stage of the journey you are at. 14 years ago I was so overwhelmed with shame, and had no support, I didn’t even know what was wrong with me, I thought it was all in my head. But now I know that there are many women out there who struggle with Vaginismus and that it is highly treatable. I have support, and I have spent years processing my shame, and now I just feel ready to complete the physical healing part of this journey.

[Ella_Belle]

Thank you vho20 for sharing. I also have experienced an uncomfortable burning sensation with using the dilators. I will continue to use them, and trust that the burning sensation will be reduced.

[Ella_Belle]

Hi Heather,
Thank you so much for your encouraging reply! Sometimes we really need cheerleaders! It was a big step to share my story on this forum. I have since shared my struggles with my mom and sister as well, so I am coming out of the shadows and secrets, and even though it is scary, It feels like the right next step.

Thank you for sharing your story with me. It is so relieving just to know that other women have struggled with vaginismus and healed from it. I know that it is possible, and I believe that I am ready, this time. With the help of my supportive partner.

I agree about sex, and vaginismus being a mind and body issue. Once I started reading the literature, I was relieved to find out that I had a physical, treatable condition. At times I felt paralyzed because I thought it was all in my head because of trauma. I have done a lot of therapy work, and I’m actually studying to be a therapist. I am very interested in addressing the issues of shame that women face, and I know that this is a part of my journey.

I like your advice about spoiling myself during dilation. I will give it a try! Can I ask how long you tried dilation only, before getting the botox procedure?

Thank you, I will keep you updated!

[Ella_Belle]

Hi Recessivegenequeen,

Thank you for your kind and encouraging reply! It is so helpful to hear people’s success stories, and know that I am not alone.Thank you for sharing your story. What are some of the ways you managed your feelings of innadequacy and shame while you were dealing with vaginismus? I would appreciate any tips. I will post some questions re. dilating as I have begun the process again, and am finding it discouraging because of a burning sensation. It’s hard to feel motivated to do a practice of something so painful and uncomfortable. But more than that, my feelings of insecurity and inadequacy, even with a supportive partner, can be overwhelming at times.

But I am determined that this time my work with the dilators will pay off, and I will achieve my goals with a loving partner!

Thanks again for your response!

[Author]

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