Conversation Starters

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    Hi all. Middlesex MD is a great blog that I’ve posted about in the past and the link to their blog is below:

    In a recent Blog, they discuss how hard it is to talk to one’s partner about vaginal dryness and the same can be so true about all sexual issues, including vaginismus.

    They give some excellent tips on starting the conversation including:

    • “Beginning the dialog. Choose a relaxed, private time to talk about the changes you’re experiencing in a way that invites dialog…Maybe you should focus on intimacy as a couple and take it easy on vaginal penetration for a while….

    Doctor says. Schedule a visit to your ob/gyn and include your partner in the planning or in the actual visit. Our partners’ objective opinions about the changes they observe could be really helpful. Do they have questions or concerns? What do you both need? Then, a discussion of the visit may be in order—what did the doctor say about your options and how might things progress?

    Their turn. We aren’t the only ones experiencing change, sexual or otherwise. Our partners may be struggling with age-related issues, too. Opening the door to dialog might allow you both to talk more frankly—and understand each other better.

    Charting a path forward. The conversation isn’t over. Everything isn’t resolved, but maybe the door to difficult communication about midlife change is open a crack. Do you have some idea about what to try next? How to keep the intimacy and tenderness alive? Do our partners know how you feel and maybe what you need? Do you? Do they know that they’re still attractive to you and that you’ve been avoiding pain, not sex?”

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