Waking Up to a New You … and Painless Penetration

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Home Forums Vaginismus Support Group Vaginismus Post-Procedure Waking Up to a New You … and Painless Penetration

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    In Chapter 10 of Dr. Pacik’s book, When Sex Seems Impossible: Stories of Vaginismus and How You Can Achieve Intimacy, he writes:

    “In January 2009, I was walking with my wife, Janet, along the beach on Honeymoon Island, discussing how patients still remained fearful about dilation, even after they had been effectively treated with Botox to prevent vaginal spasm. That’s when Janet suggested that dilation (necessary to continue to stretch the tight muscles for comfortable intercourse) could actually begin under anesthesia, as a way to jump-start the process and overcome mental blocks.”

    I can never describe in writing how important this aspect of the treatment was to me (i.e. waking up with the dilator in place and zero pain). I know that I would’ve been a patient that still remained fearful about dilation even after being treated with Botox if I did not actually wake up from the procedure with the dilator in place. Prior to this, I was not able to insert a thing – even a q-tip and I felt like I was broken. Upon awakening, this was the first time something was inside of me EVER and it did not hurt at all. I remember being so emotional and so happy and my husband experienced the same awe feeling as he had always only witnessed me experiencing pain with any attempts. Thank you so much from the bottom of my heart to both Dr. Pacik and Janet for having this procedure available to women with vaginismus. Prior to discovering it, I had searched for 11 years to find a cure which is far too long. Now, post-procedure, my husband and I continue to enjoy pain-free and pleasurable intercourse and I am able to use tampons comfortably as well as undergo GYN exams and tests. None of this would’ve ever been possible without this treatment program.

    Ladies, what was your experience waking up with the dilator in place following the procedure? Did you feel like it jump-started the process of overcoming vaginismus? Any advice and comments that you have will be very helpful for future patients.


    I woke up from my procedure and my vagina had already pushed the dilator out. I wasn’t wearing tight enough underwear to hold it in. The nurse told me to insert the dilator back in, and it actually hurt really bad, but I forced it in. At first that freaked me out an I thought “oh no, the procedure didn’t work!” But then the rest of the day went well- I dilated up to #5 that day and the next day and my dilating has been going well. I’m even starting to dilate briefly with number 6 now, almost 2 weeks post procedure. I think for me the big thing that changed in my head is that it IS possible to get something that large inside me. The painless part will come with time as my muscles stretch. I can tell a difference in the type of pain I feel now, no longer the excruciating, sharp spasm pain, but the normal burning stretching feeling that happens with dilation. But my anxiety is greatly reduced now and the pain might not even be worthy of being called pain- it’s more like discomfort.


    I just had my procedure done today. I woke up with the giant blue one in. It wasn’t so bad just turning it and moving it in and out (without removing it entirely) but after it was out, the pain of pushing the dilators through is still causing me to panic. I am worried but still hopeful. They continue to go in, but mentally it is difficult and my husband has done it every time so far. I want to get the glass ones since I’ve read that you don’t have to press as much to get it to go in. We go back in tomorrow for our follow up.


    Louisa, I would definitely recommend the glass ones!! The first couple days I didn’t like them as much, but I just had to get used to them. But they are *definitely* worth the money and WAY easier to use on a regular basis. 🙂 And the dilating will get easier the farther post procedure you get, it can be frustrating, scary and stressful in the beginning, but it really does get easier. 🙂


    I agree with Becca. To any future patients reading this, the glass dilators are great! They are much shorter in length than the pure romance ones which makes them more comfortable. I found it difficult to do activities with the pure romance dilators but could do almost anything with the glass dilators and others have posted regarding even shopping while dilating with these ones.

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