Using dialators post treatment

Home Forums Vaginismus Support Group Vaginismus Dilating Using dialators post treatment

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    Hi all! 🙂 I have been battling with Vaginismus for about 10 years now. I have tried a few different treatments (including dialators- I was able to get a medium-sized one in, but the large one was difficult and I kind of fell of the wagon). It just took me so long to even realize that I had a problem and what that problem was. There really is not a whole lot of support out there for this condition, so finding Dr. Pacik and this community has been so wonderful and such a relief for me. I’m still in the early stages- I haven’t had my phone call with Dr. Pacik yet but I am looking forward to starting my journey to success! I have been reading a lot of the posts, including the success stories and they are really inspiring! I am nervous about the procedure (medical issues make me anxious- needles, etc) but it was comforting to read that others felt the same way and were still successful! I guess my biggest question at this point is how long do you have to use the dialators after the treatment? Obviously for the first month or two but I was reading some posts where a year or two later, they still had to be used before intercourse, etc. and I know things are different for everyone, but I wasn’t sure if that was something that I can be sure to expect or not. Any help is appreciated 🙂 Thank you and I’m looking forward to sharing my success story in the near future!


    Hi Zinnia. Welcome to the Forum and thank you for your post. I am so, so happy you have found Dr. Pacik and this Forum and please, please know you have all of our support. I, too, suffered with vaginismus for several years and could not even insert a q-tip prior to receiving the procedure. It also took me so many years to just realize and understand what was wrong. I thank God every day that I had this procedure as it was the cure that my husband and I prayed for. I just know everything will go well for you. I, too, shared many of your concerns before my procedure.

    Regarding, the procedure itself:

    I was also very nervous about having the procedure itself and the anesthesia and arrived in NH sweating, trembling, and freaking out. I met with Dr. Pacik, who was so, so sweet, and he provided me with IV Verced which took away these physical symptoms of anxiety that I had always experienced. I promise you that you will never meet a more genuine, caring, and compassionate Doctor than Dr. P and he, along with all of the staff, go out of their way to make you feel calm, comfortable, and supported for your entire time in NH. And, so importantly, they thoroughly understand everything about the condition of vaginismus more than any doctor or group that I have ever met. I wanted to also share a couple of other posts from 2 treated patients that I think may be helpful:

    “I was treated on Jan 20th, and the months prior to that I was definitely scared of the procedure, and even just getting the IV! What really helped me was having someone there who was completely involved and supportive. That could be a close friend, sister, mom, boyfriend, husband, etc.. Whenever I started feeling anxious, it was so good to have someone physically there to vent to or even just to tell me that everything will be okay. I also felt more confident after reading Dr. Pacik’s book “When Sex Seems Impossible” and also the experiences of others on the forum. This goes through the entire process step by step so there were no surprises. I knew exactly what to expect.”

    “I am the biggest baby ever when it comes to pain and fear and I was so afraid of having the procedure. But honestly, Dr. Pacik and his team were amazing. They gave me a mild sedative to take the night before and the morning of and when I got to my appointment with my sister everyone was so kind, understanding and loving. When I started to get anxious they gave me something in an IV that helped me to feel calm and not so anxious. The procedure itself was a piece of cake as I didn’t remember anything. And afterwards I woke up all wrapped up in a nice warm blanket and I just couldn’t believe that I had the dilator inside of me without any pain. The entire two and a half days I was there everyone was so kind and helpful.”

    Regarding how long do you have to use the dilators post-procedure:

    I wanted to share an excellent Blog from Dr. Pacik regarding this question: In it, he writes:

    “Following treatment for vaginismus, the patient returns home to continue dilation two hours a day and sleeping with a medium dilator every second night for about four to six weeks. As a patient progresses and becomes more comfortable with dilation the amount of time for dilation can be reduced first to about one and a half hours, then to one hour a day. It is difficult to suggest a formula because each patient progresses at a different speed. This is the value of keeping a daily dilation log and corresponding with Dr. Pacik after Botox vaginismus treatment.”

    I think you will receive different answers from many different women here. I personally dilated for a year post-procedure, taking some breaks in-between. In the immediate months post-procedure, I stuck to a strict schedule. Thereafter, the more frequently we had intercourse, I would dilate less. Then, I stopped prior to intercourse and would solely dilate prior to ob/gyn exams. While I know that I probably didn’t need to then, it made me feel more comfortable to get used to the feeling of something inside of me prior to the speculum and helped me to relax much, much more.

    Sending you big hugs, positive energy, and support!!!!


    Heather, thank you so much for taking the time to answer me so thoroughly and thoughtfully. That was all REALLY helpful and I’m feeling a little less nervous already. I’m SO excited that I found this treatment, it seems like my golden ticket to having a “normal” life and a “normal” relationship, which I honestly wasn’t sure I’d ever be able to have. I’m with a wonderful man now and for the first time, I’m not pushing him away like I did with everyone else because of this problem I was afraid to face. This forum seems like an awesome and really supportive way to talk about uncertainties and questions too. Thanks again and I’m sure I’ll be chatting with you again soon 🙂

    Quote from ZinniaOpal on September 23, 2014, 23:02
    I’m with a wonderful man now and for the first time, I’m not pushing him away like I did with everyone else because of this problem I was afraid to face.

    This is so, so, so wonderful Zinnia. While going to college in my early 20s, I dated and when it got to the point that it might lead to intercourse or him discovering my problem, I always pushed the guy away – every single time EXCEPT the guy that I met when I was 25 (then boyfriend, now husband). He was like no other guy I had ever met and he didn’t go away despite my attempts to push him away several times. Instead, he was my ROCK and my number one support through this whole journey. We will be celebrating our wedding anniversary coming up on 10/14 and I thank God every single day that we found each other and feel so blessed.

    Please, please know I am here for you and, again, I am so glad you found Dr. Pacik, the Forum, and this amazing treatment program. Sending you hugs!!!


    Hi ZinniaOpal, welcome! I too found this forum very helpful when I was starting to natvigate around for something that would work. I wish you the best and always keep hope and don’t give up! I had my procedure in July and I have a feeling I will have to dilate for at least a year. I dilated for about 2 years before I threw in the towel and decided to get this treatment and since July it has been so much easier to dilate but I think I still have a ways to go. Every one is different, you will know what is working and not working for you and Dr. Pacik can be really helpful along the way!

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