Tearing posterior fourchette, tightness and friction pain during sex

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    Hey, I’ve been having issues with posterior fourchette tearing that has been getting steadily worse over the years. I read another post about a similar issue and finally realized that it might be because of birth control. For many years I took depo-provera because it was much easier to remember to get vs oral contraceptives. I’m now on nexplanon and I think the years of using oral, depo etc have worn down the elasticity of my posterior fourchette. I’ve also noted that overall my vagina has gotten smaller and less stretchy.

    Every time I’ve been to the gynecologist I’ve been prescribed cream for candida. I’ve gone through it 3 times now over the years and it simply hasn’t fixed the tearing.

    I’m going to talk to a gynecologist about getting dilator’s and a hormone cream, estradiol to help. Is there anything else that anyone might think would help?

    The tearing isn’t too bad, but it does sting and sometimes bleed a little and going to the bathroom afterwards is painful because of it.

    My partner and I’s sex life has also diminished because of this issue. It’s not exactly fun when your posterior fourchette tears at penetration and then inside feels like mini rug burns from friction as well as just overall tightness.

    We have tried to use lube, fore play etc and it helps somewhat, but not enough.

    Also if this wasn’t the right place to post this, let me know. I’m unsure if my issue is Vaginismus or not.


    I think the birth control could be a big factor here, and the estrogen cream will probably be very helpful. I also find the suppository Intrarosa can be helpful for the internal friction burning.

    You can develop a secondary vaginismus from painful penetration. Your body will anticipate the pain, and tense up all the pelvic floor muscles. This is a bad cycle, cause every time you have intercourse, your body tenses, the vaginal muscles tense, the entrance to the vagina gets smaller, and penetration is more painful.

    Dilation will help with any muscle tension that has built up over time.

    Coconut oil is a great lubricant and can be used at the vaginal entrance as well.

    You can also explore Pelvic Floor Physical Therapy as well.

    But a good start is some hormonal support for the vagina/vestibule and dilation.


    Hi sinvanor!
    I’m so sorry to hear about your frustrations!! We all love it when our ducks are all in a row, but adulthood doesn’t work that way, sadly. But!! You seem very informed about your current situation, and you already have tried many things to help yourself out. You’re definitely headed in the right direction! I too have the nexplanon but haven’t experienced that personally, but maybe you could take it out and see how your body reacts off birth control for a few months? I know that can be scary, especially if you do not want to get pregnant right now. But there are lots of great tools and apps out there that help with tracking your period and ovulation! Maybe pausing penetrative sex, just until you get your vagina back to good health, could be beneficial to you. All up to you, of course! But maybe it could help prevent the beginnings of secondary vaginismus, since you wont be experiencing the pain until you’re healed. I hope this helps! And I really hope that estrogen cream works for you! Good luck 🙂

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