New Blog: Vaginismus Procrastination – Taking the first step

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Home Forums Vaginismus Support Group Tips for Future Vaginismus Patients New Blog: Vaginismus Procrastination – Taking the first step

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    Hi all. There is an excellent new Blog posted today: Vaginismus Procrastination – Taking the first step:

    Excerpts from the Blog include:

    “Women with vaginismus tend to procrastinate about treatment because of high anxiety to penetration, fear of pain with penetration, fear of failure and much more. Taking the first step is important in order to begin the process of overcoming vaginismus.”

    The steps include 1) Gaining more information about vaginismus, 2) Joining a Forum to avoid feelings of isolation, 3) Seeking the opinion of a qualified physician, and 4) Getting treatment.

    Concerning the steps, Dr. Pacik writes:

    Gain more information about vaginismus: has a wealth of information that will help you understand vaginismus such as “what is vaginismus”, “what are the causes of vaginismus”, “what are the symptoms of vaginismus”, and “what available treatments for vaginismus”.

    Join a forum to avoid feelings of isolation: The VaginismusMD Forum is a place to introduce yourself, share your personal story, ask a question, and discuss ALL aspects of vaginismus and the treatment program. Do not be afraid to join and become an active member. This is a friendly, safe and most importantly private forum.

    Seek the opinion of a qualified physician: By filling out the VaginismusMD contact form, you will be given the opportunity to fill out two questionnaires that will be used to evaluate your level of sexual pain and to determine if you are a candidate either for a lesser treatment or if it would be best to have the Pacik multimodal Botox treatment under anesthesia

    Lastly, get treatment: With my retirement, many women thought that they lost the opportunity of receiving the Botox treatment program. It is with pleasure to announce that the website will now be supported by Maze Women’s Sexual Health, a medical group in New York that specializes in female and male sexual health. In 2010, Maze brought their team to New Hampshire so they could observe the Botox treatment of two of their vaginismus patients. During the two days we spent together, many questions were asked and the entire flow of treatment and follow-up reviewed. Maze participated in the email follow-up and both women were successful. Since then, Maze has treated many other vaginismus patients with excellent results.

    Concerning contacting Maze, Dr. Pacik writes:

    “If you have procrastinated about getting treatment you should request the questionnaires so that you can get a free evaluation. These questionnaires can be requested by using the VaginismusMD Contact Us form or by contacting Maze Women’s Health directly with questions or to schedule an appointment. They can be reached at 914-328-3700 or by email at”

    This is an excellent Blog and I encourage your feedback and comments here.


    I have just gone through this post and cannot disagree with you that I have found it equally excellent. Just wondering how it would have worked for overseas patients, considering cost & travel constraints and different reimburement system. If you can refer to any useful information here.

    Much appreciated!

    Kind Regards


    Hi Daffodil. Currently, Maze has an excellent treatment program for those traveling from out-of-country. To discuss further, you can contact them directly at 914.328.3700 or I also wanted to share 2 excellent links concerning patients who were treated from out-of-town and out-of-country. Please know that I am here for you always!!!


    Hi all. As the year is winding down, I re-read this post and Blog from January. I am now 39 years old and vaginismus free. However, I did have primary vaginismus all through my 20s and into my early 30s. I did not find treatment until 2011 when I underwent Dr. Pacik’s Botox treatment program and was thereafter cured. During the time that I had vaginismus, I felt isolated and like I didn’t know how to go about taking these first steps to overcome. I felt like the few providers we visited made it worse by saying “it’s all in your head, just relax, etc.” and I had zero success with trying to dilate on my own with the kit. I wanted to overcome so badly but did not know how to go about doing it. Fast forward to now, in 2016, by joining this Forum and even reading this post, you have taken the first step in overcoming your vaginismus. You are not alone with this and have an excellent community of support. In addition, you have a group of practitioners in Maze that understand the condition and have successfully treated it for so many. If you haven’t had a chance to or were to nervous too in the past, take the step and give them a call to help you to overcome. Just today, I read an awesome success story of a woman who overcame. She was incredibly nervous and was prescribed Xanax prior to her appointments and this helped to alleviate the anxiety symptoms and to focus on dilating. I, too, was prescribed an IV relaxant prior to receiving the Botox treatment program and this helped to relieve my physical anxiety symptoms that had always been present in the past with any attempted exams. They, again, have the tools and thoroughly understand how to help you to overcome vaginismus. Please know that you have my support and the support of everyone in this Forum 100%!!!!


    Thanks Heather. Girl, you are so brave and generous in sharing your story with others! You give people so much hope.


    Thank you so much Rachel! I truly believe that if I can get through this treatment and overcome than anybody can and it is 100% possible to be vaginismus-free!!!


    Looking back on the forums, this post really spoke to me. It took me a long time to self-diagnose as having vaginismus, and when I did, it still took years for me to tackle the problem. I was in college when I first figured out my situation and heard about the botox treatment for vaginismus, and I wasn’t in a place financially or mentally to take such a big step in my treatment. But as the years passed, it became more and more of an option – I left college and moved to New York City, where the Maze clinic was located. But even then I kept telling myself “I’ll figure this out next year, but right now I’m happy with myself.”

    What finally caused me to make the change was my boyfriend – a few months into our relationship, he told me that he cared about me a lot but that sex was important to him and that if we were going to be together, I needed to do something to try and figure out for myself. At the time this was devastating to hear, especially since my vaginismus caused me so much insecurity, but this was what finally caused me to make an incredible change that improved my self-esteem so much in the long run.

    I probably would have kept procrastinating forever without my boyfriend’s intervention. Every year would have made me say “Maybe next year…” until I’d spent decades of my life dissatisfied with myself. Vaginismus was a huge problem for me and what I really needed was someone to help by giving me a reason to face my fears. I encourage anyone who’s reading this who is afraid to confront their problem to acknowledge that often we need help conquering our demons, and to find the person – a friend, a partner, a family member – who can give them the support they need to stop procrastinating. Then, do it. Don’t waste another minute denying yourself your becoming.


    The first step is acknowledgement. Once you acknowledge vaginismus and give it a name you are ready to seek treatment. I do think that acknowledgement is a huge step in your journey to overcome vaginismus.
    My advice is to acknowledge not judge yourself. Be kind to yourself and know that there is a cure and you can be helped.

    Helen Leff, LCSW

    This thread is an important one. What’s difficult is that many women feel that they are alone in this.
    So happy for you recessivegenequeen and Heather; thank you for your honesty, openness, courage , and hope.


    With the new year approaching, I like to bring back this old thread about vaginismus procrastination. Too often we see women put off their vaginismus treatments for so many reasons, fear, shame, embarrassment, etc.

    What I know about vaginismus for sure, is that it doesn’t just go away on it’s own.

    There are great treatment programs out there, and there is no better time to treat the issue than the present.

    If you are considering treatment, please don’t put it off. It is not easy, but there is a lot of support out there to help you through it.

    Helen Leff, LCSW

    I couldn’t agree with Melissa more and I believe that with 2019 approaching this post couldn’t be more timely. There is treatment for vaginismus and you will be successful if you decide and choose to get the assistance and support that’s available. Let us know how we can help.

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