Need Dilating Advice!

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    Hi All,

    I had the procedure on 3/23 and have really been doing my best to keep up with the dilating, but I am still having considerable pain. Even more than I had before! I was not a Level 5 and could use the dilators (somewhat), insert tampons and get an OB/GYN exam prior to the treatment. Now I can get the purple in, but have major issues with the pink/glass. It hurts/burns/stings the entire time it is in and even for several hours after it is removed. Does anyone else have this issue? I know with repetition it should get better, but I have been trying for over a month! I sleep with the purple in at least every other night if not more, and when I wake up the pink is no easier to insert.

    I have tried about 6 different lubes (including coconut oil) and it doesn’t seem to make a difference. I also took the great suggestion of using the We Vibe to relax everything, and that does help, but I often don’t have time to hold the darn thing there for an hour!

    Maybe I have something else going on, but I wanted to see if anyone else struggled a lot with dilating post-procedure. I do read some comments here, but most seem to be how people are doing well, which is great, but am I the only one???

    I also have no idea why I have this condition because I don’t have any fear of pain and even have to give myself a shot once a week for Rheumatoid Arthritis, which is quite painful but doesn’t really bother me at all!

    Any other dilating tips would be appreciated! Thanks!!!



    I have my procedure on 6/9 and I fear what you fear. I can have GYN exams yet the use the pediatric tools, I can insert very slim tampons it takes time or a few but I can eventually get them in. I’ve gone through 1/2 a box on vacation in Puerto Rico before just so I could swim. I’m scared I’m not going to be cured and reach my husband and my goal of ever becoming pregnant one day :-/ I’m scared I’ll get so far and not be able to insert one of the larger dilators in or get it in with pain and not get it out. I’ve been reading lots of posts some from 2011 and 2012 and I clap loud and strong to those ladies who can have sex and not hit that wall after a week!!! I pray and hope that’s me. I too can tolerate pain I’ve had many dental procedures done on my teeth in the past. Sorry I can’t answer your question much. Good luck…

    Dr. Pacik

    Mirchi-I reviewed your records and noted that you had a negative cotton tip test indicating that it is unlikely you have associated vulvodynia or vestibulodynia either of which could be a source of pain post procedure.

    The important thing to remember is that everyone progresses at a different pace. It is in large function how well the muscles respond to dilation, much like any physical therapy for a musculoskeletal problem elsewhere.
    We discuss “mindful dilation” during the counseling to help patients understand that you need to be fully aware of the dilation process, honor your body, and do not try to rush the recovery. Stay with the smaller size dilators until you are comfortable advancing. You will recall that I mentioned no matter how well you do with dilation the day following treatment, there is always some regression post procedure. When we put ourselves on a time schedule we are not being mindful. I know there are pressures for you, much like all of my patients. Just stay with the smaller dilators until you are comfortable advancing. Slow and steady always wins the race. Hope this helps somewhat. I would like to hear from our other “dilating divas”!


    Hey Mirchi- I understand how you feel. I had my procedure 4/22 and I feel like things are moving slower than I want them to. After my procedure I could dilate with #4 easily, but have had pain with #5 and Very high pain with #6. This has worried me since I need to be able to dilate comfortably with #6 before attempting intercourse with my husband. He is the same size as #6. I worry that I won’t make the progress I need to before the botox wears off and then I will be back at square one! Dr. Pacik has also told me to keep dilating and be patient, I just have to work on it! What I have found to help me is instead of thinking about how much farther I have to go, I try to celebrate the little victories and changes I see each day. Keep my mind in the present and not worry about the future too much. I have made little bits of progress, and I try to celebrate them no matter how small they are. If you notice any teeny tiny improvements, don’t forget to celebrate them!


    Hi Mirchi — It is so frustrating when all you want is to be able to advance with the dilators and you can’t. I remember struggling quite a bit at different times with mine. The first few days after procedure I could not get the #5 in again due to burning pain and it was frustrating. Then later when I was trying to move to the #6, same thing, horrible burning pain. Eventually I think you will be able to handle it. It’s just hard waiting and having to move slowly. 🙁

    I discovered through dilating that my vagina is *extremely sore and sensitive* the week before and the few days following my period. I would have horrible burning pain, such bad pain I cried a few times. I never knew my body was like this until after the procedure since I never was able to insert anything! But now every month the week before my period and the few days after I try to dilate, but sometimes I have skipped dilating for days (even more than a week) at a time because my body just couldn’t tolerate it. And I was easily able to pick back up with the dilating when my body had calmed down. Just wondering if it could be something related to your cycle and that could be causing some of your pain. Like Dr. Pacik said, stay with the smaller dilators until your body is ready, you really will get there in time. 🙂

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