I am suffering from Vaginismus!

[shahreena.s]

I am 16 years old and I’m suffering from vaginismus. I can never use tampon, I can’t have even a finger inside me, and penetration is completely impossible. I felt so horrible and worthless. I felt like im not worthy to be a woman and I can never have sex for the rest of my life. But recently I discovered that there is a botox treatment for vaginismus, and I really think that the botox treatment is my only hope. I just can’t put anything inside me no matter how small it is. I can just feel the pain when I think of something going inside me. I’m wondering how old do you have to be in order to be able to go through the botox treatment?

[mazemelissa]

Hi Shahreena,

I am so glad you found our forum. You are not alone, and we understand all the feelings that you are having. The good thing is that you are trying to overcome this at a young age. A lot of women will just ignore the problem, and it doesn’t just go away.

If you wanted to go ahead with the Botox procedure, you would need parental permission.

But I feel that you should try some of the less invasive treatment options first. I would strongly recommend you try to find a pelvic floor physical therapist in your area to work with. As well as purchase a really good set of vaginal dilators to start working with. Like the pure romance or soul source set.

If you are in the NY area, you can come for an appointment at our center, and we can start working with you on vaginal dilation. If traditional dilation doesn’t work, then we can consider the botox procedure.

You can always give our office a call for a free 10 min phone consultation and speak with one of our therapists or clinicians to get more information.

Hope to hear from you soon.

Melissa

[recessivegenequeen]

Shahreena.s, welcome to the forums! It’s very brave of you to be seeking answers, especially this young, and I’m glad you’re not giving up.

I know it feels hopeless right now, but it’s not, trust me. Vaginismus is fully curable once you find the right treatment method. I got the botox procedure myself (at 25), but I would echo Melissa’s sentiment that you should try working with a pelvic floor specialist and dilators first before going for the botox method. But if those don’t work, know that you have options.

[Sks823]

Hey shahreena.s,

I just wanted to say I really relate – I was around your age when I figured out I might have a problem with penetration down there, but it took me years to realize there was a name for it – vaginismus – and that it was as common as it is.

Let’s look on one bright side – it’s GREAT that you found this forum and know that you have vaginismus. Looking through this forum and knowing that there’s a name for your difficulty with penetration (and LOTS of others have gone through the same thing and recovered) is a good first step, as well as knowing that there IS treatment available and you CAN overcome this!

Since I overcame vaginismus with dilators – dilation physical therapy (not on my own, but I went to Maze Women’s Health in NYC) – I always enthusiastically suggest this, but like you said there are other options too.

Like the others, I recommend trying dilators first – I bought dilators for myself and could NOT use them on my own AT ALL. I put them away for several months. I eventually did some more google searches after moving to NYC and came across Maze Women’s Health Center and decided to do a phone consultation with them, then I made an appointment.

I thought I was a difficult case seeing as I couldn’t wear tampons, hadn’t had a pap smear, and had EXTREME anxiety my first few appointments. The thought of dilating with even the smallest dilator gave me immense fear.

BUT… I persisted. With the help of Maze, after my first couple appointments (and failed attempts at home and WANTING to give up, and thinking I might be that one incurable case), I was able to insert the smallest dilator by myself. After I knew I could do that, I had much more confidence and was SLOWLY but surely able to move up in dilator sizes every appointment (I had appointments every 2-3 weeks), dilating mostly daily between appointments. Each time I moved up in dilator size, I felt accomplished and motivated. Also, after being comfortable with the first couple dilators, tampons went in easily!

So I wanted to reach out and share a bit of my story. While there were times of frustration and times I wanted to give up, I’m so glad I went out of my comfort zone to make the first appointment and perservere.

I think no matter what, you will have to discuss this with family/your guardian(s). Another early step would be to look up other women’s health centers & try to get an appointment with one that has experience with vaginismus so they can show you how to use dilators. If you are covered under health insurance, you can maybe call them or look up online – ask if they cover a pelvic floor therapist or what the copay will be. A quick google search shows a bunch of pelvic floor therapists that take a number of insurances.

Maybe this link will help: Finding a Pelvic Physical Therapist: Where Do I Even Start?
https://www.mamaonthemend.com/blog/2016/4/26/how-to-find-a-pelvic-physical-therapist

and then the next important step is NOT GIVING UP and NOT LOSING HOPE. It might not be easy but with time and determination you can do it! Vaginismus is SO TREATABLE, it CAN BE FIXED! Definitely look through some success stories on this forum to show you that there were so many of us in your shoes that were able to overcome this.

Good luck, try to stay positive and optimistic, & keep us updated.