I’ve got a question for the specialists out there. I’m 24 and I’m married. I was diagnosed with vaginismus three years ago and couldn’t have PIV contact at all (it was as if my husband hit a wall when he entered me). For about two years I’ve followed treatment and thanks to my pelvic floor specialist I was able to have PIV sex. The ‘wall’ was gone! Unfortunately, sex itself still hurts and I’ve received the message from my specialist that nothing more can be done for me. I can use all the dilators, and my pelvic floor muscle is working fine so she says this is the end point for her. She calls it “rest pain” if I remember correctly, and apparently this is something pretty common among vaginismus patients. Are you guys aware of this? At least I can now have PIV sex but my husband sees I’m in pain and that kind of ruins the whole experience… how common is this?
Hi Simone – can you tell us more about the pain you still feel during intercourse? Is it at the entrance to the vagina, deeper inside the vagina, etc? It’s possible to have both vaginismus and another pain-related condition like vulvodynia or vestibulodynia.
Hi Simone! When I first became cured I, too, experienced pain during penetrative sex for quite some time. And I think it came from the disconnect between my head and body. My muscles were under my control but the fear and anticipation of pain made me tense up and caused me… pain!! So frustrating! I would definitely get checked out, to rule out anything and make sure you’re healthy! But it also could just be anxiety. Maybe it’s not enough lube, or the wrong lube, or no lube? Or maybe you may even want to dilate before sex to help prepare your body.