Breaking down my wall!

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    Whilst we have not transitioned to intercourse yet and I am still working with the dilators, this is such a success story for me that I just had to post it!

    I tried working with dilators for four or five years before my treatment with Dr Pacik this month. Whilst I made some progress with it (at one stage I was able to get up to the largest one), the progress was not adequate or sustainable because (as so many of you are familiar with), my muscles put up such a hard brick wall insertion was either impossible, or took me hours to achieve! And of course, intercourse with my husband has always been impossible.

    Even after the treatment, I was still battling to get the dilators past the wall… when I first got back home after our trip, I panicked that the botox was not going to work on me because I was still experiencing this problem as before, but over the following week, whilst it was still there, it because more easily crossable, and whilst there was some discomfort, the pain was only with the insertion, slight and very bearable. Last night, however, I found for the first time ever that the wall was not there!! I was able to easily insert the dilator without having to battle with this, and it went smoothly in. This was just with the small purple one, but a massive achievement and gave me so much hope. I’ve tried again this morning with the pink (going straight from the purple which I slept with), and the same was the case, and with zero pain! I will try the blue shortly, but as this ‘d-routine’ is such a roller coaster ride with so many ups and downs, I wanted to savour and share this progress whilst still on a high. I’m sure I will have more difficult days, but this has given me real hope that intercourse will soon be achievable!!

    Good luck to all you ladies who are somewhere on this journey… even if at present you still think it is impossible, with perseverance, and with the help of Dr P and his team, you will make progress!

    Dr. Pacik

    Post procedure dilation is a “roller coaster” ride during the first 1-2 weeks after treatment. The muscles are still tight and “talking back” as they are being stretched. Since most women feel they will be the one person for whom Botox does not work, any difficulty with dilation immediately verifies these feelings. Then the muscles loosen up as the Botox is taking effect and the week or two of dilation is starting to be noticeable with less pain and therefore less anxiety. Now it is just a question of continuing with the program of dilation, and most of my patients at this stage begin thinking of transitioning to intercourse. Thanks Arose for posting this. It is so true.


    Dr. Pacik is correct that dilating early on is a roller coaster ride. You are making progress and definitely celebrate every success! Even once you start trying intercourse you will have days where it goes smoothly and days where you wonder if the procedure worked. Stay positive and keep trying. I remember thinking will intercourse ever not have to be a “robotic” process. A little over 3 years now from my procedure I can tell you I rarely have to worry or get prepared to have intercourse. You are doing great and soon you will not even think about all the dilating and struggle. 🙂

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