Hi ichan252. I am so, so sorry for what you are currently going through and want you to know that I am here for you and will help in any way that I can. I think beginning again with the smaller dilators and then working your way up to the larger ones may help. I had neurosurgery in February after my procedure and took a lengthy break from dilating and intercourse. Then, when I was cleared to, I started back up with the smaller sized dilators and worked up to the larger ones plus intercourse and this really helped. I also wanted to pass on a previous Forum thread about the topic of thrusting:
In it, Allie writes:
“What helped me was after I have dilated for about 20 mins I would move my dilator in the thrusting movement. I just needed to get used to the feeling. This is what helped me!:)”
ichan252, please, please know we are all here to support you. Sending you big hugs!!