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Hi LBS1515!
I’m sorry you had a scary experience like that. And I looooooove what everyone above had to say! Females don’t get the proper preparation for penetrative anything. But one great tip that helped with my vaginismus was connecting my mind and body. I did this in the safety of my bed, and I just inserted my finger up to the first knuckle, and going clock wise… gently press the inner wall entrance of the vagina and massage it. Tell yourself out loud(this gives you more reassurance) that you are safe, that you are in control, and that pain doesn’t have to be a factor. This really helped with my “wall” situation by desensitizing the entrance of the vagina. Along with your PT, this should help a lot! I hope this works for you! 🙂 And for future exams, you can ask for Valium! I always ask my Gyn and it helps sooooo much. Best of luck!