Not sure what’s happening

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    In my 20’s I was very sexually active, no problems with penetration. I had my daughter when I was 29 that same year my marriage broke down & I did not have sex from 29 – 55.
    I had a hysterectomy at 42 due to cervical cancer. Pap smears are a bit uncomfortable but not too bad. I have just recently started using a vibrator & have no problems inserting it, though it does need to be held firmly in place or it is pushed out.
    My problem is I have just started attempting to have sex after 28 years and everytime my partner & I try my vagina just pushes him out. He sometimes manages to get in but is always pushed out, except one time when I took something to relax me & we managed to have sex. I don’t want to have to ‘take’ something to have sex. I want it to be natural & permanent.
    My doctor prescribed a low dose hormone but it made no difference & I have no problem with lubrication & I feel no pain.
    Do I have Vaginismus? I’m happy to try any therapy, I’m determined to fix this. Thanks


    It does sound like it could be vaginismus. Vaginismus is a tightening of those initial muscles into the vagina. If it’s vaginismus, you would need a set of dilators to work on gradually relaxing those muscles, making penetration easier. The estrogen cream is helpful in maintaining the vaginal skin and preventing atrophy, but it won’t help with the muscle tightening. Of course, I can’t make a diagnosis over the internet, so you should follow up with your provider and express your concerns.

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