A BIT OF SUCCESS

[MotivatedMumma]

Hi I just wanted to share something with happened to me this morning.
I was given a set of dilators about 8 years ago and they when to the back of the cupboard.
The last three weeks I have managed to get from a brick wall to inserting the largest size! Before today the largest looked far too big. But this morning, I questioned if I had picked up the right one. It felt smaller, like my mind had relaxed and accepted that my body will accommodate this.

I’m not saying it went in without some discomfort. However I have now started to call it a sensation rather than ‘pain’. And that method has helped me lots.

I’m just really pleased to have this success after 10 years of vaginismus.

I’ve just ordered a size 7 from Crystal Delights to eventually be able to accommodate my partner. Good things to come!

I’m so grateful for a safe space to share, Thankyou !! 🙂

[Jennifer Dembo, LMSW]

@MotivatedMumma: that was a very special message, and we’re sending our most emphatic congratulations!!

I’m wondering if there was anything in particular that inspired you to locate your dilators and begin to use them after many years. You don’t have to share specifics, but sometimes it can be encouraging for others to know if the motivation was situational or based on current life circumstances. And if you don’t want to share, then there’s no pressure to do so. We’re just so happy for you, and we wish you all our best as you continue to enjoy your success!

[MotivatedMumma]

Hi Jennifer,

in 2018 I started to want children- but knew I was going to be unable to tolerate penetration. it always felt like there was no way something of that size would ever fit. I did some research and stumbled upon a product called a Mosie Baby home insemination syringe it was smaller than a finger. With that and LOTS of lube, I managed to conceive my first using this syringe- and then conceived my second a few months later also using the syringe. During childbirth (although I had two c sections) I had to undergo examinations under epidural. Coming away from that whole experience knowing I was able to insert the syringes myself, and that my body COULD accommodate examinations (even though I couldn’t feel this) made me realise that I could do this I just needed to relax and focus. Im no where near ready for medical exams or penitration- but I feel this is a great milestone on my journey to success.

I hope that’s ok 🙂

[Jennifer Dembo, LMSW]

That is more than ok, @MotivatedMumma – it’s incredibly generous of you to be so open with all of us! It’s wonderful that you were able to recognize what your body is capable of. But this neurological switch can be hard to flip! So kudos to you – and don’t worry. Consistency with dilation, self-compassion and your commitment to changing cognitive thoughts will hopefully help you meet your next round of objectives. Stay strong and keep up the great work!

[recessivegenequeen]

Congratulations, MotivatedMumma! This is a huge development and I’m so glad you’re moving so quickly and realizing what your body is capable of! I think your story is really interesting and has a lot in common with those of us who have had the Botox treatment at Maze – a key part of that procedure is waking up with a really big dilator inside you and realizing that your body can accommodate penetration even if your mind is more stuck on that idea. I think that realization is key for a lot of people’s success.

Congrats again on your rapid progress so far and keep at it! I hope you’ll be able to experience penetration with a partner if that’s something you want – I know you can if you keep working at it!