Home Forums Vaginismus Support Group Vaginismus Dilating Lack of motivation Reply To: Lack of motivation


Hi Vee0706 – I’m so sorry you’ve been having this problem! Both the physical and emotional factors can make it SUPER hard to motivate to dilate. We all have busy lives and finding the time and fortitude to stick with something so demanding takes work, so I want to validate that you’re undertaking something hard and it isn’t always straightforward!

When you’re struggling to make the commitment to dilate, I’d first recommend resetting your goal somewhere that seems manageable, whatever that looks like. Tell yourself you only have to do 5 minutes, or even that you just have to TRY dilating every day, and you’ll start to see more consistent results. It can be easy to psych ourselves out by putting expectations on every session being long or productive, but consistency matters more in the long run and is more meaningful when building a habit. And this time commitment won’t be forever – it may help to think of it as a project in service of starting a family.