Reply To: Being single and dealing with vaginismus

[recessivegenequeen]

Hi Patty22 – I just want to second Helen’s excellent advice! There is no wrong way of doing it, it just depends what you feel you want out of sex when you do have it. If it’s a priority for you to explore intercourse with someone you trust and you know someone you feel you could have a friends with benefits arrangement with, go for it! But if you’d rather wait to find a partner you see yourself having a relationship with while maintenance dilating along the way, that’s totally okay too. There’s also nothing wrong with a one-night stand, but while you’re working on transitioning from dilators to a penis, it often helps to dilate right before trying to have intercourse which might not be as natural a “flow” of events with a total stranger. It helps for the other person involved to at least know that you’re working on something related to intercourse in case it takes more effort than you were expecting. Hope this helps and good luck out there!