Hi Jane91 – thanks for sharing your story! I think what you’ve experienced is so common among people with vaginismus who struggle with sex and desire being demonized by communities they trust like their church and faith. I was raised in a more openminded home but my mother still talked about sex in a way that made me scared of it which is probably part of why I dealt with vaginismus for so long. I think we as a culture have a long way to go in terms of normalizing these messages and teaching young people to make these choices in an informed way that doesn’t demonize totally healthy and natural feelings.
I’m not a parent myself, but Maze has made an amazing resource guide for how to talk to children and teens at any age about sex, which I think could help faith communities start these conversations. You can check it out here: