Reply To: Tips on Starting Dilating

[Heliopsis]

Hi Yami,
How are you doing with the dilators you bought? – I have the experience that there can be lots of difference in which dilator sets you are using. It depends for one – how quickly they increase in size and how small the smallest is. And secondly from what type of material they are made.
The first time I tried dilating I bough the smallest vibrator I could find – which was mad out of a type of soft silicon and not very stable – there was no way I could enter this one – it was a) too big; b) it wasn’t stable enough and c) it had this rough surface which caused way to much friction.
The main thing I would say from my experience – don’t know how it is for other people – just joined this forum – that you have a set which starts with a very small size and increases slowly. The material should be made out of a hard material either glas or hard plastic, which provides you with a good smooth surface. This smooth surface and the rigidity of the material will make it much easier to enter. Sounds strange at first but it is true.
Additionally you should use a really good lubrication. I am using “Deumavan”cream after a recommendation of one of my doctor: https://deumavan.com/en/products/ Its not a lubricant and I am not completely sure if its good to use longterm, check with your doctor. However it helped me at the beginning because it keeps the dilators lubricated for quite a long time and makes it easier to enter them. Compared to all the other lubricators I had tried before. My therapist ones recommended to use a layer of water based lubricant and than a layer of oil-based lubricant to make it slide better and keep moisture longer, I tried and I am not sure its much better – but it might work for some people? But it never was as good as this “Deumavan” cream for me. Any experience here, which lubrication works best?
I got some dilators hand-made in Germany prescribed there, which were enormously expensive I think I paid like 180 euros for each single size (got three in the end), they were made out of plastic which is used for dental stuff and they are incredible comftable and quite good to enter:
http://vagitom.com/vagitom.html
but I think they are too expensive if not covered by a health insurance!!! Which wasn’t the case for me – and slowed my treatment enormously because I just simply couldn’t afford to buy them at the time. I wasn’t aware (as I was never told or diagnosed with Vaginismus back than (like 10 years ago), they just told me that I had some kind of scar tissue at the entrance of my vagina, which would cause my problem and that either dilation or an operation would cure it) – that in the international world they are called dilators and are much cheaper to have. Now ten years later I tried again a treatment by living now in the UK my doctor actually diagnosed me after 2 years with vaginismus and after one year of waiting time I got to a nurse appointment in the woman hospital, which prescribed me quite a cheap set of dilators made off hard plastic. They are way more painful to enter than the other ones – but if you get over it it makes a big difference and it really works and it gets slightly better each time! They prescribe the Amielle Comfort here: https://www.amazon.co.uk/Amielle-Comfort-Dilators-Instructional-Vaginismus/dp/B0045XBSWC/ref=sr_1_1_s_it?s=drugstore&ie=UTF8&qid=1533910613&sr=1-1&keywords=amielle+comfort
and they recommend not using the biggest one its to big and not necessary. I hope that helps a bit. And I hope yours are working fine! – but I assume you could compare the smallest sizes to see if your set starts with the right size?
I wish there would be more comfortable ones out there, which are affordable – but I am on the last one now – so I am not sure if I would like to spend more money in finding something better. Any experience out there which ones are best? How are the crystal delights they look quite good. However I am not sure how the shape makes the feel? Is this small tip with the quick increase easier to enter?
It might be interesting to know that in Germany they recommended to leave the dilators in for 30 mins each day, which is possible with the ones they prescribe. Here in the UK they recommend to use them only for five minutes, I don’t think you could use the ones they prescribe for much longer and – it gives you much more lifetime back. How is it in the US, what do you guys recommend? How long do you use them every day?
I am very puzzled why there are not better treatments in place at it seems to be quit “simple” to be treated it is crazy that people like myself suffer from this condition for so long. And that diagnosing it alone took maybe 14 years – I remember the first time I went to get a gynocologist being 17 to get the pill prescribed being with my first boyfriend. And I told her that I couldn’t enter a tampon if that would be normal. And she just replied don’t worry there are lots of people who don’t use them. And later I went there with my boyfriend being totally unexperienced, but we told her that having sex was very difficult and she just told us to relax and use more lubrication… So to everyone experiencing this – please don’t stop trying to find the right support. But I suppose when you end up here in the forum you already figured out what your condition is… I wish for the future that the condition vaginismus will be better known and quicker explained to people. I am glad to see that people made this forum here – very happy to see!!!
I sent you lots of strength I hope you get through the treatment much faster than I do!