Reply To: Alternative ways to still be intimate/have sex!

[kiadenmark]

This forum is all about sharing ideas and tips and tricks and asking questions, so this sounds like a *great* idea Kiala!

One thing that immensely recommend is a tip shared by someone called Blueclouds here on the forum. Lots of vaginismus patients masturbate their partner as an alternative to penetrative sex. After a while, the frequency often goes down and before you know men start masturbating again on their own behind your back. It’s easier, quicker and demands less communication from their side, but they don’t realize they are actually taking away the last intimate piece that connects both partners. So the tip is actually to ask your partner to stop masturbating and literally tell you whenever he is in the mood. This forces him to be open about his needs. You still have the choice to help him or not, but at least there is still a level of intimacy. Some women have tried it out and are as enthusiastic as I am, so I guess it’s something that deserves being on the list here 🙂