Hi sonjab – thanks so much for sharing your story! You’re right that we don’t hear this perspective as much, but it’s totally valid. A lot of women (even women WITHOUT vaginismus) just don’t get that much out of penetration! The reasons people do seek treatment are varied and complex, and I think for a lot of women what’s almost more important than the sex itself is being able to get rid of all the negative emotions they’ve felt burdened by because of their vaginismus – the shame, the feeling there’s something wrong or unwomanly about your body, the anxiety around having to tell new partners you can’t have sex, and so many other reasons. Everyone has their own reasons for seeking treatment or not, and it’s great that you’ve found what works for you. That’s why we need more education and more options, so every woman can choose how she wants to conduct her sex life.