Reply To: Not sure what the issue is

[Heather]

Hello, Charlotte25x
I am so sorry to hear you are dealing with this annoyance! I 100% understand how you feel. I too was always very anxious and scared about anything penetrative. Tampons were always out of the question, fingers too. And I never cared about dildos or vibrators. I was never abused, I just had a horrible fear of penetration. Anxiety is one of the toughest bits of vaginismus. Physical therapy is great for your body, but it’s your anxiety that requires the more difficult work. As you become frightened or nervous or tense, your PC muscles clamp shut to help protect you from unwanted penetration. Knowing this, you’d think it’d be really easy to just get yourself in the mood and convince yourself you really want it, and think that’s all it’s going to take. But it’s a double effort of both mind and body. Sex does feel amazing, and you deserve to have penetrative sex! I think what the women above said was all great, and I would highly suggest dilating! They start as small as your pinky, and go all the way up to a penis size. I got the Pure Romance kit from Maze, after I got my BOTOX procedure. You can order it online, though. 20 minutes a day, every day of the week if possible. If you find that dilating isn’t working for you, or your fear is just too strong… The BOTOX procedure is truly a saving grace, with a success rate of 97% if I remember correctly. And the women at Maze take such amazing care of their patients. You’re in good hands here. But definitely give dilating a shot first! You should also look into physical therapy. It is incredible, the tips and tricks there are for overcoming vaginismus. Once you’ve got all the knowledge and tools, consistency is all you need. You got this!