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Hey amyct23!
I am so proud of you for your courageous work you’re doing with your vaginismus! It’s not easy but slow and steady wins this race!! You WILL get that last dilator in! But you are strong, you do not need a penis to complete your journey. All this work is YOUR work. They’re your dilators, it is your vagina, and it is your determination. This is all you! Once you get that last dilator in, you will keep a good schedule where you dilate with that big one 3-4 times a week. When you transition to sex, sex will be considered your dilating routine as long as you do it 3-4 times a week. But until then, figure out what you like and what you don’t. Take this time to learn your body. Experiment with toys and vibrators(way more fun than traditional dilating) And when you get into a relationship again, you’ll already know exactly what you like and it is totally up to you whether you tell them about your vaginismus or not. You will be okay 🙂 In the future, before having sex, I would play with some toys or vibrators. Make it apart of your foreplay because it is a much better experience when you have sex after having already prepared your body by dilating. Keep going though. Don’t get discouraged. You’re so strong and you will overcome this. Beating vaginismus is a MAJOR accomplishment. You will feel like you can tackle anything after! You can always post here, too. There’s a lot of amazing women here to support you 🙂 Keep us updated!