Hi @aishat2605 – welcome to the forum and thanks so much for posting!
I’m sorry to hear that you’re struggling. As Helen mentioned above, what you’re describing sounds very much like vaginismus. I want to join her in assuring you that what’s happening in your vagina is involuntary, and that vaginismus is a highly treatable condition! I imagine it must be challenging to feel apprehensive about approaching your mum for support and that formal diagnosis and treatment may have to wait until you get to England. There are several forum members from the UK who have shared their experiences here – I invite them to please also share UK resources.
If you’d like to learn more, contact us at Maze to arrange a free 10-minute consult; we can help you determine what your next steps might be (on the immediate front and once you arrive at university).
Wishing you all my best, Aishat!